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Align Yourself With Possibility
Putting attention on your feelings gets you closer to the state of witnessing; you observe the pain without getting wrapped up in all the secondary blame, avoidance, and denial that usually follows.
In the act of witnessing, insight becomes possible. It takes detachment to bring understanding, and if you get caught up in your hurt, you won’t see the reason behind it. No one can hurt you today without triggering a hurt from your past. You have to see that in order to find yourself.
As you learn to say, “I feel hurt,” and really be with that feeling, more openness will develop. The emotions that frighten us are the complex ones, because they overwhelm the natural release mechanism. You cannot simply release guilt or depression. They are secondary formations that arose once you forgot how to release hurt.
The more hurt you honestly feel, the more comfortable you will be with pain, because the ability to release it will grow. As this happens, you will feel easier about all your other emotions. (To a blocked mind, feeling “positive” emotions such as love and trust is often just as difficult as feeling “negative” emotions such as hate and distrust. Both are blocked by old unresolved hurts.)
Feeling easy with your emotions means that you won’t get so entangled in other people’s. Instead of blaming the ones who hurt you, you will be able to forgive.
The lessons of this exercise are very profound, and it puts you back into the present, and present-moment awareness never ages. It is the same when you are 5 or 85. The discovery of freedom in the present opens the door for the permanent experience of timelessness, in which past, present, and future are revealed as illusions compared to the true reality, which is always here and now.
Adapted from Ageless Body, Timeless Mind, by Deepak Chopra (Three Rivers Press, 1998).
feelings, witnessing,
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7 comments
add your comment »I am so grateful for all the great comments. I t is such a difficult task to find oneself and be here now. I have made a lot of progress but am so impatient and want it now. I read books, listen to tapes, know what is right and still struggle. Sometimes it seems so useless but then I know once we brake through it is wonderful, peace and love all the way. Thanks everyone.
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I personally found that trying to force my ego into submission in order to gain complete control of my own thoughts was extremely difficult. And being who I am I simply did not possess the fortitude to stick to the regimine of mental exercises required to make it happen.
And yet, 3 to 4 years since I began this journey into discovering my true self and my spiritualness, that I have far more mental clarity than I ever had as a child or young adult with far more control over my emotions and thoughts. Why?
Because I want to. Because I asked the greater being, the source, whatever you choose to call him/her/it, for this greater mental clarity. While it took some time for the fog to clear, with patience and the persistant desire for clarity and presence eventually those happened for me. I continue to hold this desire and know that I will only continue to gain greater control of my own thoughts and empotions in time and consequently further control of my life experience.
The big questions is, do I always exercise that control, absolutely not!
Because I get great creative ideas from source and guides this way. The trick is in knowing when you're listening to your intuition vs. your ego.
A good friend of mine said you'll only get the answer to that by gauging how you feel about the information. Are you excited and thrilled or hum drum and anxious?
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I like what has been said here very much. I would just like to add that I think the ability to become distracted and to get lost wandering down all the possible potentials associated with any train of thought is just the other side of our unique human ability for abstract thought which must be mastered to make it a conscious tool. I live with six excellent cats and their being always in the present, the eternal moment of now is an anchor for me.The sheer weight of the proportion of their six minds to my one makes present consciousness somehow more weighty here. The mental gestalt we form is perfect for all of us since my abstract capacity lets me care for them properly and they keep me here, they always remind me of NOW so I don't drift off and get too neurotic. Perhaps it would serve you to think about all the moments when you ARE in the present, how it feels and proceed from there. This is how it is for me: any work or craft that demands my 100% attention; anything where my attention is in my body from yoga to hard physical work to making love; bringing my attention to the moment coupled with breathing; becoming aware of my "self" within my body.Some people can sit in contemplation very well but for others movement is more satisfying. Whatever the activity, when I come home to the present, this true place of all potential, I feel safe and refreshed. I find it a great relief to have escaped mental wanderings and that wherever I am this place is always adjacent to it.
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Regina, I find that if you just focus on whatever it is you are doing, allow your senses, such as touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste and let them guide your thoughts.
Your mind will try to coerce you into engagement, key there is to ignore it. Yes it sounds difficult, but is possible with desire and will to do so.
After time your mind will adapt to your innermost desire. Intention is another key ingredient. Just remember you are in control, so act as if you are. Most importantly, do not get upset with yourself if you find it to difficult. Because you will at first, then slowly allow patience to perservere. Then you WILL see.
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-to Regina
You can be in the present through practice. Constantly remind yourself to be in the present, breathe. I found yoga to help settle my mind better but it took a year of passionately thinking about staying in the present - whether you'd remember once a week, once a day, or once an hour - like any habit/routine you can remind yourself and it will help you accomplish anything, it will help you check your emotions and it will even help you sleep. When you practice quieting your mind, just like any muscle you will get better at it. I have found that I still cannot seem to remember to stay in the present - but my mind is quieter and my thoughts less of a whir. And when I ask it to be quiet - it can last a lot longer than it used to.
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I like the article and I know it from the book Ageless body and Power of now, still I have a tough time being present. My mind is never still. What can I do to get here? I read the books a hundred times still cannot be here.
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DEAR CHOPRA... AND ALL...
I LIKE THE PART ABOUT "past, present, and future are revealed as illusions compared to the true reality, which is always here and now."
BEST WISHES...
GERSHON...
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