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Alone But Not Lonely

Alone But Not Lonely

Discover the truth about all the people in your life who prefer their own company to a crowd of friends. Anneli Rufus author of the Party of One: The Loner’s Manifesto dispels the negative associations and myths of not being social.

Anneli Rufus is a graduate of UC Berkeley and the author of five books, including Party of One: The Loners’ Manifesto, Stuck: Why We Can’t (or Won’t) Move On and The Farewell Chronicles. She is also the coauthor of five more travel books, including Weird Europe and The Scavengers’ Manifesto. Currently she writes about food, health, sex, and other topics for TheDailyBeast.com, the Huffington Post, Psychology Today, and Alternet.

Dive deep with us as we discuss the ways that we get stuck in life and the simple, but not necessarily easy fixes to creating a life that is responsive and open to change. Insightful and funny, this is a conversation that will make you think twice about the social relationships that define life.

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Related:
Introvert or Extrovert: Take the Quiz
For Those Alone Times, Wisdom of the Hermit

Read more: Ask the Loveologist, Love, Making Love Sustainable, Relationships, Sex, Spirit,

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Wendy Strgar

Wendy Strgar, founder and CEO of Good Clean Love, is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love, intimacy and family.  In her new book, Love that Works: A Guide to Enduring Intimacy,  she tackles the challenging issues of sustaining relationships and healthy intimacy with an authentic and disarming style and simple yet innovative adviceIt has been called "the essential guide for relationships."  The book is available on ebook.  Wendy has been married for 27 years to her husband, a psychiatrist, and lives with their four children ages 13- 22 in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.

150 comments

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12:03PM PST on Feb 12, 2013

Thanks for the article.

6:01AM PST on Jan 15, 2013

I love being around good people and I'm the best person I know.

10:10PM PST on Feb 19, 2012

OH MY GOD do you ever shut up and let the Author talk? I am a diagnosed loner and you are exactly what drains us. I am exhausted just listening to you. I am so sorry to be so rude but it would be lovely to of heard her talk so much more on being a loner. Sophie

11:34PM PDT on Sep 3, 2011

I love my life (ALONE) -
No distractions - No one in my face
I love peace and quiet -
I do whatever I want when I want OR NOT -
I come and go as I please -
It's Called Freedom...

I have my 2 furry Cat Boys that need me, and they give me great pleasure with their company -

If I feel the need for human contact I call a family member OR friend.
If I've been in the house too long, I just get out and go shopping OR something -

Works For Me!

6:28PM PDT on Aug 29, 2011

Thanks for the article.

4:55PM PDT on Aug 23, 2011

Im a loner, i do prefer my own company, tho sometimes i have been forced in my life to be lonely and ,be a loner due to the fact of not having a lot of friends or reliable friends . I do like being on my own in my own space but, i do like sum company sumtimes but not all the time. IIm 56 now, female and cudent commit to marriage tho lived with a man and i think as u get older u change and u get worse. So now we are apart my circumstances have changed and have become more depressed,supressed and lonely, sufering from anxiety and, yeh - stuck. Sum of it is my ded and anx that stops me, i am fearful, i have lost my confidence and cant face the outside world and what it throws at me at times.

6:39PM PDT on Aug 17, 2011

It's really refreshing to read this and the comments. I'm becoming more and more of a "loner" but my living situation doesn't allow for much alone time. I'll have to try harder to create this time. Thanks for the eye opener. I guess it is OK to be like this.

9:58AM PDT on Aug 17, 2011

noted

7:33AM PDT on Aug 17, 2011

I prefer just my wife & doggies & a few select friends and family

11:26AM PDT on Aug 16, 2011

Refreshing to read all the posts from other solitude lovers! Thanks to all!

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
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people are talking

Thank you for posting

Thank you. A larger study should be done. Four hundred people just isn't enough. What about demograp…

Thank you for sharing, they usually take after their owners,

Thanks for the good article and cute picture.

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