http://www.care2.com/greenliving/breast-is-best-but-dont-show-your-nipple.html
Breast is Best (As Long as We Don’t See it)!
Feeding a baby involves nipples. Either artificial ones made from I-hope-they-are-not-toxic chemicals, or the real thing. As in a woman’s nipples.
Sadly, it’s the real thing that makes many people uncomfortable. Facebook has dubbed “obscene” and removed unknown numbers of breastfeeding images. And while over 234,000 have protested these actions, even companies focused on healthy, nontoxic living showcase 100% of a latex nipple attached to a bottle, while nowhere show even 1% of a real, living nipple feeding a baby the way humans are meant to.
As a culture with a breastfeeding deficit, perhaps the majority does not understand that when a baby latches onto a breast, some fraction of the areola is almost certainly going to show. This could be why publishers unknowingly hinder the normalization of breastfeeding with rules specifying how much of a nursing breast can appear in an image, excluding, “any part of the nipple.” Yet, rules like this effectively prevent people from passing on the healthy knowledge of what a normal latched infant looks like. In addition, they keep breastfeeding on the periphery of acceptable social behaviors: “Breast is best, BUT don’t let me see your nipples!”
As a breastfeeding mom, I try to be discreet feeding my babies (as do all the mothers I know). Yet, if someone is looking directly at my baby latched to my breast, he/she will see some part of the areola, classified as “part of the nipple.” And while nature designed the nipple to look like a bullseye so babies could catch it, for most of our culture it marks a very different spot.
This is a spot that makes the new mother, perhaps not a particularly outgoing mother, perhaps one that feels a bit self-conscious anyway, feel very nervous feeding her baby where others can see. How many times has society’s refusal to celebrate and normalize images of healthfully latched babies contributed to a mother giving up, uncomfortable feeding her baby anywhere but her home?
To alleviate this discomfort, now for sale are the increasingly common boob burkas designed to hide the nursing baby and breast from public. Perhaps they help some mothers feel safer nursing in public, but these “aids” also help seal the secret, increase the mystery of the nursing babe. Is it possible that one day, nursing will only be allowed in private breastfeeding rooms unless you don the Hooter Hider? Maybe we should ask the women in Afghanistan - I wonder if they foresaw the current requisite attire for women in their country.
One might argue, “but things are getting so much better.” “Everyone is stressing the importance of Breast is Best.” And even, “The breastfeeding militia is forcing the breast on everyone!” But look European paintings from the 1200’s-1800’s that include women breastfeeding - you can even see Virgin Mary’s nipple! These were times when women were clad from head to toe in clothing, yet they popped out their breast to feed their babies. And the painters sharing this history had no qualms about what fraction of the nipple was exposed.
It had to start somewhere, this forced covering of a woman’s body. Women in Afghanistan wear burkas to hide their entire body. Conversely, but equally sexually, Americans highlight the flat chests of 4-year-olds with pink triangle bikinis. We feature cleavage in woman’s worksuit attire. So hail the plastic nursing nipple, for it allows us to claim the woman’s body for one exclusive purpose: sexual arousal. We can almost forget that Mother Nature intended her breast to nourish. Almost, but not quite because the plastic nipple still holds that pesky shape, which looks remarkably…nipple-like.
When a woman’s body becomes more about sex than anything else, it limits what a woman can do. It becomes something she uses to attract and please others, something others want to control. I grew up on the Southern California coast, playing my socially acceptable role as a bikini-clad teen shrieking down the beach on episodes of Baywatch. After years of encouraging my own objectification, I’ve been pleasantly surprised by the empowerment I’ve experienced using my body for nourishment as a mother. And while this might not be everyone’s experience, why do we allow society to dictate but one singular purpose for all of our female bodies? When a woman is empowered to use her own body to nourish her children, it puts her in charge. Does this scare people?
Each of us can do our part to make the nursing mother feel safe and confident feeding her baby by normalizing images of breastfeeding. Or, we can hide the nursing mother, heightening the mystery and even shame associated with her nursing breasts. It strikes me that we as a culture might need to address our obsession with breasts as purely sexual “objects” to make reasonable progress. What do you think?
Hilary Stamper has spent the last nine years focused on environmental advocacy. With the birth of her first child, she also began advocacating for birthing and breastfeeding mothers, attempting to help them feel empowered by their birth experiences and build confidence as new parents. Now living in Half Moon Bay, CA with her husband and two homebirthed children ages 2 and 5, Hilary spends the majority of her time focused on green parenting and connecting children with nature.
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204 comments
add your comment »"There is no shame to bf, just the opposite."
And what is the opposite? Feeding in the dark because you're afraid of the abnormal becoming the norm again?
"Those of us who can do it should be proud; and I did not mean to hide the bf, just the BREASTS."
By saying breastfeeding shouldn't be done in public, you are saying to hide breastfeeding.
"You do not get the idea of respect, which is very typical I am said to say of your generation."
I get respect, I respect the mothers breastfeeding in public enough to not stare and complain about something that is so trivial it shouldn't even be an issue. My generation didn't grow up in the dark ages where everyone abided by the bible's standards, and even in the bible's age women breastfed in public all the time and no one complained.
And you still didn't answer my question Roberta,
Why is it okay for men to show their breasts in public but it's not okay for a woman to show her breasts in public, even if it's to take care of her baby?
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This is still ridiculous. I have never once seen a woman breastfeeding in public who did any more than "expose briefly" as you admit you have occasionally done yourself, Roberta. Where are you folks spending your time that you seem to see so many women letting their boobs swing in the breeze? I'm sure they exist but they are NOT the majority. Every practice, every activity, every belief, has a fringe group. The ultra exposers would be the fringe of breastfeeding mothers. You're not going to change them, so just look away. And stop harassing everyone else who just wants to feed the baby in peace and be left alone!!!
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There is no shame to bf, just the opposite. Those of us who can do it should be proud; and I did not mean to hide the bf, just the BREASTS. You do not get the idea of respect, which is very typical I am said to say of your generation. You get it from the tv.
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"I love that a women is bf her infant, toddler or 4 year old"
Then why are you shaming it? What are you afraid of?
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"Why do you insist that bf MUST be forced on everyone?"
I didn't say it should be forced, I'm asking why if you think it's so disgusting, why are you looking? Who's forcing you to look?
Also, why is it okay for men to show their breasts in public but it's not okay for a woman to show her breasts in public, even if it's to take care of her baby?
If you don't like it, don't look.
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Sarah, Your comments are childish. Why i it so difficult for you to just respect others? Why do you insist that bf MUST be forced on everyone? I bf many, many babies; and found it not at all difficult to cover, neither did my babies. While at times I would expose briefly, this has happened to all of us; that is not the same as the in your face attitude which is going to put people OFF of bf in public and cause this to become another court issue.
It is NOT the bf a baby that is the issue here, once again it is the DISRESPECT of others. I love that a women is bf her infant, toddler or 4 year old; I do think she should take a little effort to not expose her breasts.
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"I don't want to see your breast while I'm trying to eat dinner."
Who's forcing you to look? Why do you have to stare anyway?
"Please respect me enough by not exposing yourself."
Please respect the mother enough by not chastizing her for taking care of her baby.
In Saudi Arabia women openly breastfeed in public even with their veils on and they don't complain even half as much as the people in America do.
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There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding your child in a public place....but please COVER UP. I don't want to see your breast while I'm trying to eat dinner. We are both paying customers who need to respect eachother. Eating out is something many people enjoy, and have the right to enjoy. I don't mind if you feed your baby at the table. Please respect me enough by not exposing yourself.
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Of course the advertisement is much, much worse. I do NOT think women should hide away, the photo above shows we can discretly nurse a baby. It is nto about letting someone see you are nursing, I think this IS about letting it all hang out and exposing yourself.
And the sexual arrousement is real; although not for all guys. My husband has had enough 'esposure" to nursing that it does nto bother him, even though he is a pastor. He out of respect will turn his back, but it doesn't bother him. Not the same with others though, and we should respect them enough to be discrete.
And the Olive Garden "restrooms" I have been in have plenty of room to rest, and feed baby, very comofortably so that I would not mind.
There is a huge selection of very stylish clothes that cover you while nursing. I have nursed my baby at meetings with no one the wiser.
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Unless I missed something, the woman in the Olive Garden incident WAS being asked to hide away in a bathroom.
I'm all for quiet time with baby. But women used to have to accept that if they were going to breastfeed, they were going to have to be stuck at home most of the time. Many of today's women reject that notion, and reject the idea that they can't live their lives and breastfeed their children at the same time. And some of them reject putting a blanket over the baby's head because that DOESN'T work well for every baby.So they do what they need to do as efficiently as possible and that is simply NOT the same as exposing themselves or letting it all hang out. What a ridiculous exaggeration!
The sexual arousal argument is a weak one. Ask your husband, boyfriend or son which he would find more arousing: a veiny set of mommy boobs, or the perky, pushed-up, barely covered variety in the window of the Victoria's Secret shop at the mall? We do little but shrug and **look away** when 14-foot-tall billboards display a near-nude woman, her nipples only barely covered by the fingertips of someone of the opposite sex (a la Calvin Klein style ads). But we shriek in indignation when a sliver of flesh is exposed on an airplane or at a restaurant, in the context of a child being nourished. And we wail that it's unreasonable and a violation of our rights if we are asked to simply **look away**. Sheer lunacy.
This thread could go on another 200 posts and nothing would change.
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