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Ceremony to Heal a Relationship

Ceremony to Heal a Relationship

Life is as fleeting as a rainbow. A flash of lightning, a star at dawn. Knowing this, how can you quarrel?

Healing a rift with someone close to you often requires an initial period of reflection on what has disturbed the relationship and what will bring about reconciliation. How can we open our hearts? What will ease our minds and soothe our bodies?

Here is a simple but powerful two-part ritual to help you begin the process of healing your relationship, and begin anew.

Lighting incense, particularly one with a fragrance connected with comfort, such as sandalwood, can help create a soothing atmosphere for such reflection. Choose a quiet place, perhaps where the disagreement took place. Or you might sit in front of your home altar with symbols before you of the relationship that needs healing. These symbols can be letters, photos, pages from your journal, anything that speaks of the person or persons involved.

Light the incense. Breathe in its therapeutic scent. Lift up your shoulders and roll them three times forward and three times backward until they are fully relaxed. Allow the incense to burn out completely.

Sometimes we donít know why or how division has pushed us away from the people or places we care about. Separation sometimes just happens. Other times we remember harsh words, misunderstandings, and exclusions from the fold. It all hurts, but the pain does not have to last forever.

A phone call, a letter, even an email, can be the beginning of erasing the line of separation. As long as the goal is pure, coming together again can happen.

Choose an incense fragrance that is completely new to you. Try one that is pleasant and light to reflect your cleansing, perhaps a citrus scent, which is associated with fresh energy. You might enjoy one of the delightful fragrance sticks imbued with a fruity aroma, such as mango, strawberry, melon, berry, or pear. By opening yourself up to something as simple as a different fragrance, you begin the path to other changes. In your own way, ask for the strength and clarity to bring about change in your life and your relationships.

Read more: Spirit, Guidance, Self-Help

Adapted from The Essence of Incense, by Diana Rosen (Storey Books, 2001). Copyright (c) 2001 by Diana Rosen. Reprinted by permission of Storey Books.
Adapted from The Essence of Incense, by Diana Rosen (Storey Books, 2001).

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Annie B. Bond

Annie is a renowned expert in non-toxic and green living. She was named one of the top 20 environmental leaders by Body and Soul Magazine and "the foremost expert on green living." - Body & Soul Magazine, 2009. Learn Annie's latest eco-friendly news on, a website dedicated to healthy and green living.

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The Essence of Incense

Bringing fragrance into the now


+ add your own
11:12PM PDT on Apr 13, 2013

Thank you.

11:11PM PDT on Apr 13, 2013

Thank you.

11:11PM PDT on Apr 13, 2013

Thank you.

11:08PM PDT on Apr 13, 2013

Thank you.

11:07PM PDT on Apr 13, 2013

Thank you.

12:03PM PDT on Aug 13, 2011

Thanks Annie!

6:03AM PDT on May 25, 2011

Thanks for the article.

2:33AM PST on Nov 11, 2010


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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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