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Do You Depend On Others?
Hurt isolates us. When you suffer, you suffer privately, no matter how close someone else may be to you. Some people react to this isolation by becoming even more alone. They nurse their grievances in silence. They gain a sense of strength from toughing it out alone.
Other people react in the opposite way, wanting to pull as many people into their suffering as possible.
Both tactics defy the first law of healing, which is that it must occur within yourself. This isn’t the same as going it alone or toughing it out. That’s the ego’s interpretation, and if you look a bit deeper, you’ll find that what’s really going on is resistance. The ego is saying, I don’t deserve to have this happen. I’m going to sit tight until someone notices and takes pity on me.
We all have ego reactions, and they must be overcome. If you face them for what they are, temporary energies that block your true self, you will realize that calling on your true self–the soul, higher consciousness, deeper awareness–will begin to move these obstacles out of the way.
When you gain access to your true self, even a little bit, you will feel connected once again.
Of course other people can be a comfort and a help along the way. As you reconnect with yourself, you will reconnect with other people spontaneously since they are a mirror of your self.
But depending on others to solve your problems never works, because even though you may feel connected to them, you are really reaching out as one ego to another.
Healing doesn’t take place at the level of ego, however, and no matter how much sympathy and agreement you are surrounded by, no matter how many people tell you that you are right, you haven’t removed the blocks that keep new life from rushing in to heal you.
Adapted from: Peace Is the Way, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2005).
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8 comments
add your comment »Personally I have learned a great lesson on asking for help. I was extremely independent and ran a one woman show so to speak. Then I had an accident which left me disabled for the past three years. I became humbled very quickly and have learned that I cannot do everything on my own. I am Thankful for the lesson and know that spirit will bring me out of this soon. Doors are opening and answers are coming quickly. Looking back I had many opportunities to "get this" but I was too busy fixing everything. It is a tough job to take care of the universe! LOL There is a "flow" and until you learn to accept as well as give you may find yourself getting a "hard push" as I did. Always have been a stubborn one :)
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Man, asking for help is like that same thing that keeps smokers smoking... just THINKING about asking is enough to make one want to numb out...forget that they need so much help. Asking for help is much different than playing a victim.. it comes from a place of surrender.. and trust that divine intelligence is involved somehow.
thanks for this entry...
I feel connected!
:)
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Silvia, I have been doing searches for that book but no luck. Any suggestions?
Thanks :) Katherine
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Really Dixon, really? Why are you continually on and on about things that you do not agree with? You really continue to confuse me, sir.
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The greatest "ego trip" of all is to believe or at least claim to be God, or part of God. That is what the devil did.
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I wish I had family that I could speak to with the problems we have but they basically really don't care because as they say they have problems to and they just don't want to hear mine so I just keep things hidden it is better that way all the way around.
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When damaged I always want to hide myself away to lick my wounds and mostly sleep until I'm all better or know what to do. Mostly it's a quickly muttered "Heeeelp!!!!!!!" To Goddess mother of all living beings. Then I might complain a bit to my herbalist buddy or wait for a dream, or my body to tell me which of my stored medicines to take. I trust my medical intuition when it comes to myself.Once after an extended period of fasting and meditating and doing yoga at Big Sur in Ca. I came down with very bad kidney pain. Here I was basically alone in the woods with no money to speak of. The ride I got back to S.F. stopped at a roadside market and my body said "GIVE ME PICKLED ARTICHOKE HEARTS NOW", something I never would think to eat before or since, I ate them all and by that evening I was all better.It only amazes me that my body mind could speak english to me and tell me exactly what it wanted. I trust myself like that. It has happened thusly in other ways and times. I don't know why I'm this way but it's so.
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i never say to myself i don't deserve this
more i don't need this right Now!or why is this happening!But if you want to heal really heal read this book Little Bear Life's Lesson a blind dog's divine vision.
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