Feng Shui for Better Relationships

The ancient Chinese system of Feng Shui can help us to find greater fulfillment and happiness in in any area of our lives, but for most of us, relationships are of primary importance.

The Relationship gua, or area, is located in the far right corner from the entrance to your room or home. This area is where you focus to attract new friends, a significant partner, or even a marriage. It influences your ability to create nourishing relationships and develop and maintain the quality of those relationships. Find out what objects to place in this area–and what to avoid–in order to improve your relationships. We also include some some helpful Feng Shui principles for better relating, all right here:

What Goes in the Relationships/Romance Gua:

Mirrors, especially in round or oval shapes.

All things pink, since pink is traditionally the color of love.

Pictures of loved ones. Just be sure not to place so many friend pictures here that a partner can’t get in because of all the other people in the way.

Paired items. Matching items, such as a pair of candlesticks, two flowers, or two matching crystals are perfect here. Keep the pairs united. If you’re looking for romance, a pair of ducks in the form of figurines or posters, or a print or embroidery of a dragon and a phoenix are traditional romance-boosters.

Anything beautiful or inspiring. Poetry, artwork, comfortable seating–anything that nourishes your soul–will all help you to trust your ability to attract, receive, or deserve good things is life.

What to Avoid in the Relationships/Romance Gua:

Television. Avoid developing relationships with TV personalities rather than real people!

Computers. Unless you plan on meeting a mate online, computers don‘t belong here. You risk spending too much time on the computer and not enough time relating to others face to face.

Anything that ticks. If you’re looking for love, ticking causes stress, pressuring you to feel as if you don’t have enough time to create partnerships.

Helpful Feng Shui Principles for Better Relationships:

1. Unblock communications by simply telling your truth, using “I” statements.

2. Listen. Try repeating others’ statements back to them, so they know you’ve heard what they said.

3. Protect yourself by avoiding unhealthy relationships. When we relate well with someone, we find ourselves able to be whomever we want, express our true feelings, and behave in ways that feel good to us. Less healthy relationships are ones where we try to change ourselves in order to please others, have to watch what we say or do out of fear of judgment or repercussion, and find ourselves behaving in ways that undermine our sense of personal integrity.

4. Use humor to deflect negative energy. A basic Feng Shui cure for bad chi is a crystal that can break the dark cloud of negative energy into thousands of sparkling little pieces of light. In relationships, humor can act like a crystal and transform tension into laughter.

3. Mirror back the image. Sometimes people are unaware of the degree of negative chi they are sending out. Sometimes mirroring their own behavior back to them is all it takes to stop poor behavior in its tracks. After years of being bullied by her older brother, one young woman finally decided she was no longer going to accept his insults as truth. The next time he called her stupid, she calmly countered, “You just insulted me by saying I was stupid.” The brother looked shocked and answered, “No I didn’t! You’re crazy. Why do you have to be so sensitive?” But she didn’t lose ground and continued mirroring: “Now you are calling me crazy and over-sensitive.” After a few more interactions along those lines, the brother actually stopped himself mid-insult one day and rephrased the sentence in a totally different way. The mirroring worked.

Adapted from Teen Feng Shui, by Susan Levitt (Inner Traditions, 2003). Copyright (c) 2003 by Susan Leavitt. Reprinted by permission of Inner Traditions.
Adapted from Teen Feng Shui, by Susan Levitt (Inner Traditions, 2003).


LMj Sunshine

Thank you for sharing.

LMj Sunshine

Thank you for sharing.

LMj Sunshine

Thank you for sharing.

LMj Sunshine

Thank you for sharing.

Monica M.
Past Member 6 years ago

I'm glad to see these ancient oriental concept catch on in the Occident, thanks for this article.

Wedding Planning San Francisco

Gladys Doelwijt
Gladys Doelwijt9 years ago

I like the humor part. It really breaks up tension, however not everyone appreciate it.
For me it is a must in a relationship.

Danita Dunkin
Danita Dunkin9 years ago

The act of intentionally arranging items in a more positive way fills the room with desire and love. The energy you release into the area is just as important as the proper placement of the items. I love your hints to a better life! Thanks

Khrymsun Elyse P.
Khrymsun P9 years ago

Both views have validity. In one case the ticking is relaxing. However, when having an intimate relationsip listening to the ticks can cause undo pressure - the "hurry up, time is wasting" syndrome. You might want to have a wind-up clock that you can move into another space when you and your significant other are feeling romantic.

Sumana Ju
Sumana Ju9 years ago

I love the sound of a clock ticking. I find it very soothing. It is one of my "must haves" in my home. Especially in the bedroom. Concentrating on the ticking puts me to sleep peacefully.....sumanaju