“The Martians have abducted my 16-year-old son, but I am confident they will return him at age 21, as they did my daughter.”
I heard this from a speaker at a conference many years ago, and I still chuckle about it today.
Have you experienced these phenomena? Did your teen change overnight from a fairly normal being to someone you hardly recognize, flying off the handle seemingly without provocation?
I have worked with many clients who have experienced this and am pleased to say that by working with the Feng Shui in their kids’ bedrooms, their teens’ personalities were dramatically altered. The Martians may not have returned them entirely but at least they became recognizable again!
Julie was a loving and hard-working single mom. She called me because her son Mark had gone from being a good kid who always got good grades, to being suspended from his High School for being disruptive. His grades had plummeted and he was in jeopardy of not getting into the college of his choice. She was deeply concerned about the sudden personality change. She called me in to do a Feng Shui Consultation to see if I could help.
When I got there I found that shortly before his ‘abduction by Martians,’ the family had moved to San Francisco into a house on a busy street. There in was my clue; he had changed bedrooms.
Feng Shui deals with the subtle things in our environment that over time affect us because of the amount of time we spend there. We look at the bedrooms when there are issues with behavior and health in the family. This is the most important place for rejuvenation and rest. If the bedroom is not supporting a family member, everyone suffers.
Mark’s new bedroom was a bright and noisy room with a huge sunny bay window overlooking the busy city street with sirens and traffic noise filling the space. The walls were a bright white and the bedspread and accessories bright greens and fiery oranges. Large glass closet doors covered the wall facing the bed and the rest were filled with pictures of his favorite sports stars all running, zooming and racing around the room. Surprisingly he was fairly well organized and did not have a lot of clutter piles. It was an energetic, bright and noisy space that was fun for him to be in during the day but far too noisy and active a space for sleeping.
The fast-growing, hormone-raging body of a teen would be challenging for anybody. Add to this never getting a restful night sleep and you have an explosive combination. We needed to change his too-active bedroom into a restful and rejuvenating space as quickly as possible.
First I recommended she order dark sound-resistant blackout shades for the bright bay window. I then worked on bringing in the Earth element to the space. The Five Element theory is a powerful part of the Feng Shui practice. The Earth element brings in a much-needed grounding energy to children’s bedrooms and will dramatically shift the space. (See my prior article Is Your Child Sleeping) We did this by painting the walls earth tones, changing the bedspread from orange and green to browns and gold’s and added two gold square beanbag chairs for sitting.
Next we dealt with the large mirrored closet doors facing the bed. Mirrors are used in Feng Shui as chi or energy activators and are much too stimulating for bedrooms. If they can’t be removed then they should be covered up at night. Julie got darker curtains in solid muted colors, which Mark closed at night, creating a cozier, darker and quieter space. We included Mark in all of the choices, bringing him into the process and giving him final approval. (An important factor to our success.)
Next we tackled his study area. Teenagers need space away from the parents and Julie wanted to honor his desire to have a place to study and hang out with friends so she gave him the garage/game room area downstairs.
This was a dark, dreary, uninspiring room filled with clutter, wood paneling with heavy open beams overhead. We needed to create a happy, bright clutter free place that he wanted to spend time in which unfortunately was the opposite of what was going on.
The first order of duty was to have the garage sale she had been planning, to clear the clutter. I turned his desk around so that he would be in the ‘empowered’ position, moved it away from under a heavy beam. I cranked up the light by adding three inexpensive floor lamps, strung white Christmas lights to lift the feeling of the oppressive dark beams overhead and covered the gloomy walls with bright lightweight bedspreads in lemony yellows and earth- tones. We hung piņatas on the beams with other whimsical objects creating a south-of-the-border fun and bright space.
By making the active, fiery bedroom a restful space and the depressing study an active, happy space, Mark’s behavior was transformed. The Martians had returned him. His grades were back up, explosions were back to a teen-age-normal minimum, and he was going to be able to go to his college of choice after all!
These seemingly simple changes to the spaces he spent time in produced huge results in his life and those of his loving and hard-working mom. I encourage you to learn more about how you can create a harmonious, balanced, healthy and happy home by applying these powerful Feng Shui principles.
If you would like to learn out more about how you can balance the Five Elements in your children’s bedrooms I am offering my readers a free color Five Elements Map. Please click here if you would like to receive your own copy (pdf format)
Your comments are always welcome!