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Have You Hugged Your Husband Today?

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Have You Hugged Your Husband Today?

When you hug your husband, it’s not only a boost for the two of you; it’s also good for your kids. When they see you happy–and happy with each other–it makes their world.

In fact, why not make hugs the norm for everyone in your family?

Hugs bring smiles to faces and warmth to hearts. They are uplifting when you’re down, encouraging when you’re in the midst of challenges, and celebratory when you’ve reached your goal. When someone hugs you, it gives you a sense of approval and bolsters your self-esteem. Hugs strengthen friendships, and increase feelings of love, support and loyalty.

And they’re free! So there’s no reason to hold back.

Some parents may hug their kids, but think it’s inappropriate to show affection for each other in front of the children. Recently, a therapy client told me that when she was growing up, she never saw her parents display affection towards each other. When her dad came home each evening, he gave her mom one quick, stiff, perfunctory hug–and that was the sum total of the “affection” she ever saw them share. There was no juice in that hug. No love; no joy. Her parents were civil; they were polite; they were friendly. But they weren’t loving to each other. And my client grew up wondering what was wrong in her home.

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Joanne Stern

Joanne Stern, PhD, is a psychotherapist with a private practice emphasizing counseling with families, parents, couples and teens. She’s a teacher, consultant, speaker, and expert guest on parenting and family topics, including communication, discipline, self-esteem, addictions, eating disorders, grief, and loss. Parenting Is a Contact Sport: 8 Ways to Stay Connected to Your Kids for Life is her first book. A mother and grandmother, she and her husband, Terry Hale, live in Aspen, Colorado.

56 comments

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6:51AM PDT on Aug 3, 2011

How about an article telling men to call their wives some nice petname (sweetheart, lovely, honey) daily, or bring her flowers weekly, or tell her how beautiful she is a few times a month...and all of that when NOT just trying to score.

4:42PM PST on Nov 9, 2010

Spread the love!!!

5:06PM PDT on Oct 31, 2010

Another article targetted at women. Feels like an old 50s commercial. Would've been interesting and refreshing to hear one targetted toward men.

6:44AM PDT on Oct 29, 2010

I wake my wife in the morning with a cup of coffee and a foot rub. We have been together for over 37 years now.

8:48AM PDT on Oct 27, 2010

Fantastic article filled with truth!! Rather than stressing the need for 'us time', Dr Stern shares what many of us who've been doing this for years know - 'us time' comes in many forms throughout the day. My husband and I have been married 20 years, friends have teased us throughout for holding hands, hugging and simply touching an arm or back as we pass. But our kids think it's awesome and see that it's part of the balance of life. Since my husband and I come from different cultures and rarely see things through the same lens, our hugs and positive touches have shown our kids that love helps us to reach out to each other and work to understand and compromise with one another.

There is such an emphasis on sexual touch in couple relationships but it's the daily hugs and love pats that truly keep marriages alive and vibrant.

Bravo, Dr Stern!

6:27AM PDT on Oct 27, 2010

not yet, but then again hes in the shower and I just woke up...might surprise him!

2:23AM PDT on Oct 27, 2010

Showing and sharing affection has widespread effects - not only for the person you are sharing it with, but for anyone who sees it and also for anyone interacted with following a show of affection. The positive feelings sort of rub off on everyone around you.

2:22AM PDT on Oct 27, 2010

Showing and sharing affection has widespread effects - not only for the person you are sharing it with, but for anyone who sees it and also for anyone interacted with following a show of affection. The positive feelings sort of rub off on everyone around you.

2:21AM PDT on Oct 27, 2010

Showing and sharing affection has widespread effects - not only for the person you are sharing it with, but for anyone who sees it and also for anyone interacted with following a show of affection. The positive feelings sort of rub off on everyone around you.

5:22PM PDT on Oct 26, 2010

All good except why is this article addressed to women only? Too often it is assumed that women are more 'in touch' with their feelings and easily express them. But that's not always true, in fact it depends on the family you grew up in, as per the article.

My parents were very reluctant to hug and kiss (us and each other), but I never had doubt about their love. There are other ways of showing it, though less natural than hugs and often resulting in children being shy and non-confident. I had to learn touching from my male partners and I love it but still have reservations about hugging my other friends and - especially - family.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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Am making this tonight--yum yum! Thanks

Excellent reminder. :) Thankful!

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Definitely, healthy diet is very important to eat. It is important to include more green vegetables …

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