In my last post, I reflected on why affairs happen.
I am no psychologist, but I’ve seen that one big factor is feeling that you’re being taken for granted. Often, one steps outside the boundaries of commitment to prove a point to oneself; to feel wanted, loved and respected.
So, I jotted down some thoughts on how to create those elements in your committed relationship, so that your partner wants to stay, not stray.
- He leaves the toothpaste tube open and the toilet seat up? Don’t bicker over small things: accept your partner’s little habits and idiosyncracies as part of who he/she is .
- Remember to say Thanks. Just because you are hitched now, you should not take the other person’s acts of thoughtfulness for granted. Let him know you appreciate it.
- Remember to give regular boosts to your spouse’s self-esteem. Tell him how good he looks, how well she dresses, and how wonderful you feel when you are together.
- Stop asking ‘why only me,’ or saying ‘now it’s your turn so you do it.’ Do you always want to be right, or do you want some loving?
- Don’t try to be a doormat or a martyr or the boss. A marriage or romantic relationship is different from others because it is a partnership—it works great if you meet each other half-way.
Do add your own advice and insights–there’s a lot of us out there who need Rx for rocky relationships!