Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
Tickling a woman is unlawful.
Itís illegal to pretend that oneís parents are wealthy.
If you make fun of someone who does not accept a challenge, you risk a six-month prison sentence.
Unless a customer specifically requests it, margarine may not be substituted for butter in a restaurant.
Unless you have an official permit, you may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April.
This Court Is Adjourned
Whew! With all this legislation, itís a wonder weíre not all sharing a prison cell right now. Granted, something tells me the Los Angeles Police Department has bigger fish to fry than popping people who dare to eat oranges while bathing, and that most people who saw me catching some shut-eye on top of a fridge in Pennsylvania wouldnít call the cops on me, but you never know when you might come across that rare whistle-blower who wants you persecuted to the fullest extent of the law, so itís probably better to be safe than sorry. The next time I tie up my elephant at a parking meter in Florida, Iíll be sure to bring a pocket full of quarters.
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By Annie Tucker Morgan, DivineCaroline
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