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Is Meditation Your Friend or Foe?

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Is Meditation Your Friend or Foe?

Did you ever wonder why we resist something that connects us to peace of mind and inner happiness? Isn’t it ironic how often the best things for us can be what we avoid the most? Something like meditation, for instance, that can bring us such joy can appear as unimportant, boring, and we have little time for it. Yet this is like being addicted to poison while resenting the anecdote!

Some years ago, we were in Thailand, attending a ten-day silent-meditation retreat. Each day a cheerful Buddhist monk would come to teach, and he would always ask us: “Are you happier today than you were yesterday?” As he said this, a wide smile would fill his face because he knew that we were confronting numerous obstacles to happiness, and not just the ones in our own minds. As beautiful as the coconut grove was, we were living with mosquitoes, centipedes, and snakes, sleeping on wooden planks, and did not eat after midday. How were we expected to find happiness amidst such extremes?

Yet despite his humorous tone, the smiling monk’s question was a genuine one. We were on a meditation retreat. If we were not beginning to feel happier as a result, then what was the point of being there? Why meditate if we don’t enjoy it?

Every day he asked us that same question, “Are you happier today than you were yesterday?” This had the effect of highlighting the extent to which we were preoccupied with our own concerns, doubts, and conflicts, and even how difficulties can actually feel more familiar and meaningful than joy. How easy it was to blame physical discomforts for our lack of happiness!

Almost everything we do in life is to achieve something: If we do this, then we will get that; if we do that, then this will happen. We are not used to doing something without an agenda. But in meditation we do it just because we want to. There is no ulterior motive other than to be here, in the present, without a goal of succeeding or of trying to get anywhere.

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Ed and Deb Shapiro

You can learn more in our book, Be The Change: How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Marianne Williamson, Jane Fonda, Ram Dass, Byron Katie and others. Our 3 meditation CD’s: Metta—Loving kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi–Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra–Inner Conscious Relaxation, are available at:


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9:48PM PDT on Oct 17, 2010

Good meditation ideas

2:00PM PDT on Jul 27, 2010


6:58AM PDT on Apr 21, 2010

If meditation helps you feel better or gives you greater peace of mind, go for it!
I personally do not feel the least drawn towards it!

10:20AM PDT on Apr 20, 2010

I simply love listening to bansuri music, in particular Pandit Hariprasad Chaurasia, who's music immediately calms my mind and allows me to disconnect from the past, the future and the urgent present. This devine music does not leave room for anything but listening and transportation elsewhere. Thanks Ed and Deb for a lovely article.

6:01PM PDT on Apr 18, 2010

In Yoga, I enjoyed meditation at each class. It works wonders for your inner and outer being, and is very calming for our spirits. Great Post!~

12:35PM PDT on Apr 18, 2010

Sometimes we find that we are being "used" as a tool for a higher good that we do not know about. The word catalyst comes to mind with this concept.

7:16AM PDT on Apr 18, 2010

hey Tony J - The Bhagavad Gita simply says - do not reap the fruit of your actions. Your interpretation is not that of the Gita. In fact the whole of the Gita is based on happiness, love, service

Hinduism is the most Universal loving and happiness oriented religion. As my Masters degree is in this subject.

Namaste - Swami Brahmananda - EdS

1:01PM PDT on Apr 17, 2010

I came across this bit of Wisdom some time ago -

One of the core concepts of the [Bhagavad] Gita, which is a very important scripture in Hinduism, is the notion that you have some control over your actions, but you have no control over the outcome. So if you make your happiness contingent upon a particular outcome, it may or may not happen. It frequently doesn't happen, and therefore you condemn yourself to living perpetually in frustration.

5:43PM PDT on Apr 16, 2010

On Spirit Films just yesterday, I watched a "rich" man stiff a restaurant owner and the waitstaff while being a rotten bast(*rd. Then a poor man paid in nickels & pennies for his muffin & left a whole dollar for a tip (forgoing the food he couldn't afford) making the waitress and waiting child grin. ;)

3:14PM PDT on Apr 16, 2010

Madeline - no doubt enlightenment is easy with money in the bank

but also true wealth is an 'inside job' many people with cash are not as rich as those who don't have it.

Let's all give up poverty mind. I know people who have millions and have poverty mind and others who have little $$ and are wealthy

Cheers, Ed

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thanks for informing us of this info. =]]


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