Loser in Love?

I was reviewing some of my past articles and comments from readers and noticed a common theme.  While I have been sharing my own experiences about Breaking the Dysfunctional Dating Cycle and finding a life partner I love very deeply, there are so many others still struggling with this area of their lives.  There was a common thread in the comments of people feeling like a “loser in love”, “choosing the wrong partner”, “giving up on the idea of finding someone”, or just plain “disgusted with relationships”.

Not only can I completely relate to all of these comments, I have said these exact words.  I can remember feeling as if I would never be in a healthy relationship and that there was something wrong with me, something was broken and could not be fixed.

I was wrong.  Very wrong. And all of you who have made any of those statements about yourself are very wrong too.  I feel I can say with great confidence that there is a wonderful relationship out there for anyone who desires to create this for themselves.  I deeply believe this with every pore of my being. Now understand that while there is a partner out there for you, there might be some work you may need to do on yourself to make this happen.

My journey started with a man who knew me through my work with my company Mishka Productions.  This man, Tom, watched me at my events and paid attention to how I worked with people and talked about myself.  On several occasions Tom and I talked about life, love, relationships and self-esteem.  It wasn’t until this one day when he sat me down and explained to me what he did and how he wanted to help me that I completely got it that I had to do something about the relationship area of my life.

Tom is a very high end executive coach.  He sat me down one day and shared with me what a powerful woman he thought I was and wanted to help me find that relationship I desired so deeply.  Tom and I had a very strong and honest conversation about what he perceived to be blocking me to find a healthy relationship.  He got in my face and basically told me that I needed to stop wasting time on dead end relationships, lousy self esteem and realize my own potential and magnificence.  We talked about doing some coaching together, however it was too expensive for me at the time. However, that one conversation changed my life.

After my conversation with Tom, I decided that I had all the resources within me and around me to do this kind of self coaching on my own.  I started with the premise that Tom shared with me.  I was a powerful, magnificent woman who absolutely deserved to have a healthy wonderful relationship in my life and be joyously married.  This on its own made all the difference in the world.  I decided that I was going to bring my self esteem out of the gutter and step into the woman I was meant to be.

This was the beginning of my journey.

So, here it is for all of you to embrace for yourselves.  Each and every one of us is a powerful magnificent beam of light.  Whether or not we choose to step into our beauty is key.  Do you choose to stay stuck in feeling as if you do not deserve love or do you choose to know with every cell of your being that you are beautiful,  loving and deserve love?  I vote for choosing the latter and see what happens.  With this little piece of information it is a good start.  It is a great place to begin with loving yourself and seeing all the beauty you have to offer the world and your life partner.

Love This? Never Miss Another Story.


Kamia C.
Kamia T.5 months ago

I was just talking with someone yesterday about deciding NOT to settle until you find your "Gomez," as in Mortician and Gomez living and loving well in the old Addams family show. It takes courage that we often don't try to summon up, but it's well worth it!

Vanessa C.
Vanessa C.4 years ago

very well said..thank you for this article Liz...

Natalie D.
Natalie Descent4 years ago

I am single and happy about it, thanks.

sandra m.
Past Member 4 years ago

Don't be so intent on "looking" that you fail to receive what may be right in front of you

Geetha Subramaniam

Interesting. Thanks for posting.

Dana A.4 years ago

Love yourself and the rest will follow

Eternal Gardener
Eternal Gardener4 years ago


Dolly Torres
Dolly Torres4 years ago

Thank you very much, a wonderful article.

May Howie
may Howie4 years ago


William Ford
William Ford4 years ago

Yeah my wife always said. So I keep her more enlightments.