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Move from Blame to Forgiveness

Move from Blame to Forgiveness

Shakespeare had it right. In ways both big and small, the failure to forgive kills love and murders beauty. An unforgiving attitude makes life far less loving and beautiful than it could be. Move from blame to forgiveness, and hereís how:

It is much more satisfying to experience your feelings than to blame them on somebody else. You can move through your feelings–even bad ones–to real connection with yourself and others. And because of this you can learn to:

1. become a good friend and a Kind Father (or mother) to myself;
2. give myself encouragement and support, instead of habitual criticism;
3. pay attention to my feelings and identify what it is that Iím feeling;
4. experience my feelings fully, mourning fully;
5. share my heart experience with others and experience the connection of listening to their experience.

Learning to do this will help you become more forgiving. You donít have to get angry and blame others to escape your feelings–because now youíll welcome your feelings. In short, establishing a relationship with yourself will help free you from the blaming lifestyle.

The dictionary defines forgiveness: ďTo stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone for an offence, flaw or mistake.Ē

Experts tell us that forgiveness is:
1. Letting go of a negative attachment to the past.
2. Letting go of the intense emotions tied to the past event–recognizing I no longer need to hold onto grudges, resentments, hatred and self pity.
3. Recognizing people are different, want and need different things and sometimes hurt each other.
4. No longer blaming the other person for my feelings.
5. No longer wanting to punish, realizing that punishing another will not heal me.
6. Moving on. Freeing my energy, and putting it to better use.

Read more: Spirit, Inspiration, , ,

Adapted from Becoming the Kind Father, by Calvin Sandborn (New Society Publishers, 2007). Copyright (c) 2007 by Calvin Sandborn. Reprinted by permission of New Society Publishers.
Adapted from Becoming the Kind Father, by Calvin Sandborn (New Society Publishers, 2007).

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Annie B. Bond

Annie is a renowned expert in non-toxic and green living. She was named one of the top 20 environmental leaders by Body and Soul Magazine and "the foremost expert on green living." - Body & Soul Magazine, 2009. Learn Annie's latest eco-friendly news on, a website dedicated to healthy and green living.

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3:29AM PDT on Mar 16, 2013

It's for tranquility

1:20AM PST on Jan 4, 2013

Thank you :)

10:24PM PDT on Jun 7, 2012

Thank-You, so much for this information. I have been praying for ways to know if I have forgiven someone.

4:56AM PST on Jan 24, 2011

Thanks for the info.

8:04AM PDT on May 16, 2010

TY dearest Annie!

4:20PM PST on Dec 27, 2007

When we forgive someone, and I mean really forgive them, we then know freedom. To have a burden lifted off our chest is the lightest feeling in the world, and then comes Joy.

5:47AM PDT on Aug 16, 2007

wow, my ex should read this and try some of these out

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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