Do High Expectations Sabotage Your Happiness?
March 1, 2013. I’ve been teaching class on Friday nights for 10 years now, which is hard to believe because the time has flown by. The reason I keep teaching on Friday is that, more than any other day, it is a day of recapitulation that makes way for a more easeful weekend.
It takes practice to stop leaking the events of the week into the weekend by judging them, evaluating them, comparing one week to the next and exhausting ourselves with over-analysis. On our Friday practice I ask that we relax our expectations. Come to the mat and don’t try to solve anything.
Another name for this type of expectation is Self-Judgment. This critical mindset of judging ourselves before a situation’s outcome, and again upon the result, only brings more disappointment. And what we practice toward ourselves, we also project outwardly–causing us to place heavy expectations on the people surrounding us.
We would do well to heed the advice of Eckhart Tolle in “The Power of Now” who writes: “To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease, and lightness. This state is then no longer dependent upon things being in a certain way, good or bad. It seems almost paradoxical, yet when your inner dependency on form is gone, the general conditions of your life, the outer forms, tend to improve greatly.”
Practice this mantra: May I see things clearly without making my happiness dependent upon my expectations.
Love yourself, love your day, love your life!