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Palin, Prudence, and Parenting

posted by Eric Steinman Sep 6, 2008 11:00 am
Palin, Prudence, and Parenting
82 comments

Parenting at the Crossroads

My first inclination for this post was to write about the burgeoning controversy surrounding Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, who was recently invited to join Republican-nominee John McCain as his running mate.

No doubt this is news, as this appointment of a woman as VP is true history for the GOP, whether it is truly progress is up for debate. But in gathering my notes, thoughts, and stomach to lend keystrokes to a blog post and join the chatter of pundits, I began to loose momentum. Why you ask?

Maybe it was the rapidly expanding furor and conjecture over Palin the woman/mother, rather than Palin the candidate. Admittedly, Palin’s political career has been brief and lacking a great deal of applicable experience necessary to run a country. So, instead of getting hung up on bills authored, votes cast, and legislation passed, we get a political firefight involving sexism, gender equality, and parenting.

This is most assuredly eleventh-hour clamor, provided as a much-needed final act to a rudderless political campaign that threatens to unceremoniously sink with the reprehensible legacy of the current administration. It is cynical, misguided, and hopelessly sad when more than anything the citizens of this country need a serious awakening.

But, really, I don’t want to natter on about politics or Palin (at least not directly). Throughout all this widespread partisan noise, I was reminded of the astonishing degree of judgment and dismissal that is unwittingly invited into your life, like a warm blanket of smallpox, as a byproduct of parenthood. Palin is getting it from all sides, from being a working mom with five children, for not ceasing work for more than three days to provide devoted care for her newborn with Down Syndrome, and more infamously, for having a teenage daughter who is pregnant.

The logic, I assume, is that since her experience in the public sector is so thin, that she should be critiqued by her dominant experience, her parenting.

Politics aside, being a parent is an exceedingly complex responsibility that is fraught with a great deal of contentment, hesitation and self doubt, and the mere act of bringing a child into this world leaves you, the parent, completely open and vulnerable to constant evaluation and criticism from everyone around you. Some of this criticism may be rooted in genuine concern for the child, but most often it is just noise and gossip, as a means to gain that elusive sense of superiority. I have witnessed it, felt it, and deflected it, and no doubt you have too.

To be clear, this is not meant as a defense of Palin the candidate (I wish her the best with her existing role as governor of Alaska, and that is the absolute extent of my support for her!) but I do sympathize with any parent (mother or father) who routinely finds themselves the subject of so much odious scrutiny and trifling judgment. The sad truth of the matter is that skewering parents might just be as enduring and American as dirty cynical politics.

Eric Steinman is a freelance writer based in Rhinebeck, N.Y. He regularly writes about food, music, art, architecture and culture and is a regular contributor to Bon Appétit among other publications.

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More from Eric Steinman (126 articles available)

82 comments

82 comments

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82 comments add your comment
Kerin Lee

I personally LOVE Sarah Palin and think she is an excellent mother.

Vural K.

thankyou...
Kabin
Konteyner
mega kabin

Phoenix Flame

Oh, I didn't know you lived with her. My mistake. Since you live in her home you must know what she does or doesn't do in her home and whether or not her home life is in a good state or not. The only thing I don't get is how it is some of your business.

Michelle T.

While I really dislike the political ideals of the Rupublican candidates, we are all still human and nobody can be a perfect parent. While I certainly believe in standing up for one's beliefs and ideals, I find it distasteful to sling mud in the process. It just makes the person doing the slinging look like a fool. And enough with the pig/lipstick jokes. They are silly and just spread hatred and ill will amongst our fellow Americans. The political debate should be about the issues.

Don G.
  • Don G. says
  • Sep 22, 2008 11:00 PM

Ms Palin Needs to stay in Alaska and take care of her family first,if they mean anything to her. She doesn't represent much of what main stream America wants. I heard a joke today that the only difference between her and D. Cheney is lipstick!! welll said I think

naomi f.

Since, I am one of those people who left a comment on Palin's lack of parenting skills; let me explain. My comment was in reference to the subject of this story. There are too many silly people name calling,and making ridiculous assumptions about our thoughts; it's laughable! I believe that pointing out her lack of ability in her personal life, and the choices that she makes in her personallife do indeed affect her capability to make decisions for in our government. Also, stop portraying us as woman-haters. I consider myself one of the FEW woman in our country who truly understand what feminism is about. The fact that we want Palin to be responsible for her children IS, because she is a woman, as in the PERSON who brought them into the world. Stop allowing yourself to become distracted with what equality means, it doesn't exempt the fact that we were created different, for a reasons. The fact that Palin is a non-existent parent is an important reason why she votes on ridiculous laws that favor Pro-Control over woman. The fact that she believes in sadistic criminal acts against animals, is the reason she would vote on protecting these horrific practices, the fact that she is in the oil business is why she will vote on distroying our land and in dangering our environment. The list goes on and on. You who back McCain/Palin should open your eyes, and understand that our country is letting us down and we need change not more of the same.

Phoenix Flame

I've said it once and I'll say it again, all I've seen thus far is mud slinging. The idea is to put your own candidate in the winner's circle. We keep seeing Palin's personal life and parenting skill questioned, but how is it some of your business in the first place? Have you all watched TMZ? Clearly, I think most of you have and have gotten the idea that what others do behind closed doors in their homes is some of your business. If it doesn't involve you, it isn't your concern. What is your concern is if the product your candidate is producing in office is a good one for the general good of all. Nothing goes your way all the time. Lay off the hunting thing. Clearly, the media has found a subject to put a vast spin on and I doubt that any of you know the entire story behind what went on outside of what you were spoon fed. Quit being a bunch of sheep, or Gods save you all from your own blindness and ignorance. Furthermore, why aren't we seeing the parenting abilities of the others put into the spotlight? Did anyone question the parenting ability of the male candidates of the past? Of course not, they aren't women! There is a name for that, by the way. As far as Palin's "prestige and privelidge", she worked for it. If you're so jealous, go to college and earn your own degree, bust your hump in your chosen profession, and maybe you can get what she has. Maybe. Instead of blind criticsm, how about putting yourself in her position a minute. Just because she's a woman doesn't mean

Lee B.
  • Lee B. says
  • Sep 22, 2008 12:19 AM

Right on Tracey!! Let the first perfect parent cast the first stone!!

Tracey T.

I don't think it really matters how her family behaves. just because SHE believes in abstinence doesn't mean her daughter does, or is going to listen. Have you ever been a teenager? did you believe in everything your parents did? and as far as the question of where she was when her daughter got pregnant....she is a teenager! if they want to have sex they will find a way no matter how involved parents are.

Joy R.
  • Joy R. says
  • Sep 21, 2008 3:50 PM

I do not so much as disagree with her parenting, but I do believe her actual life is in conflict with what she supposedly represents.

Yes, her son Trig has Down Syndrome. There is no way she is caring for this child without paid child care, especially as she is campaigning to be the vice president and is still governor of Alaska. That in itself is not so bad. She is anti-abortion and wants to support adoption and increased medical coverage for special needs children. The current foster care and adoption programs at the state-level are in a shambles, with many special needs children languishing in state custody already. There is already a Medicaid program for disabled children. She also reportedly returned to work 3 days after delivering this child. She is a woman of privilege who is able to afford whatever her son needs, with the exception of time.

Palin also endorses abstinence in place of sex education. Obviously her teen daughter didn't pay attention to that. For that matter, where were Bristol's parents at this time?

So her family is off limits to the media, but public attention does happen when you run for the office of the vice president. Her own family is contradictory to what she is preaching.

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