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Quiz: Are You a Fair Fighter?

Quiz: Are You a Fair Fighter?

No matter how deep or loving our relationships, occasional conflict is unavoidable. But how fairly do you fight? Take this quiz to see if you or your loved ones hit below the belt in an argument, or if you know the rules of healthy conflict resolution, here:

Answer the following questions TRUE or FALSE:

1. I try to echo back what my partner is saying. That doesn’t mean I have to agree with it.

2. We often bring up the past when we argue.

3. I try my best to speak from my very deepest truth when I argue, even if that reveals how scared or vulnerable I am.

4. It is not unusual for us to call each other names when things get really heated.

5. It’s important for both of us to empathize with one another, no matter how strongly we feel about our own position.

6. After we’ve had an argument, only one of us feels better, or neither one of us feels better.

7. After we’ve had an argument, we both feel better: the air has been cleared.

8. I can get pretty accusing when I argue: “YOU did this, YOU did that.”

9. I try to confine myself to stating my feelings when I argue: “I felt this when you did that.”

10. The most important thing in an argument is to win and be right.

11. The most important thing in an argument is for both of us to feel heard and understood.

If you answered TRUE to odd-numbered questions, your conflict resolution skills are healthy and strong. You are to be commended!

If you answered TRUE to even-numbered questions, you might want to read one of the many excellent books on communication skills and conflict resolution so that your relationships can flourish.

Read more: Guidance, Life, Quizzes, Self-Help

By Cait Johnson, Managing Producer, Care2 Green Living.

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Cait Johnson

Cait Johnson, MFA, is the author of six books, including Earth, Water, Fire, and Air: Essential Ways of Connecting to Spirit, Witch in the Kitchen, Celebrating the Great Mother and Tarot Games. She has been a counselor for more than 20 years, and teaches workshops on seasonal elemental approaches to self-healing, conscious eating, and soul-nurturing creativity.


+ add your own
9:07AM PDT on May 15, 2013


11:46AM PDT on Mar 30, 2013

good one

11:23AM PST on Feb 10, 2013

GREAT ARTICLE!!! Number 11 resonates with me more than all's a respect factor that allows both parties to feel understood!

1:09AM PDT on Sep 26, 2012

Thanks for the article.

11:56PM PDT on Sep 7, 2012

Good one. Thanks.

7:41AM PDT on Jun 28, 2012

food for thought

5:25PM PDT on Jun 24, 2012


10:22AM PST on Jan 14, 2012


4:24PM PDT on Jul 22, 2011

I'm not a afighter, but when I do fight, I'm a fair and just fighter.

12:09AM PST on Feb 8, 2011

I knew that I'm guilty for a few of this. Gotta work on 2, 6 and 8. Thanks for the simple quiz!

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

people are talking

Very helpful - thanks for sharing

Great article -thank you for bringing all this to my attention! I previously thought I had plastics …

Throw in a little brown sugar plus bacon or ham and they just keep getting better.


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