How many times have you been deeply hurt by something someone said, only to be told by them, “But it was the truth.” Perhaps this kind of “honesty” isnít the goal for true sharing between people. Read what this well-known writer has to say about speaking from the heart, instead of from “honesty” here:
The ego is always creating symbols of defeat, just so it can tell itself it was in a fight. Its claim to reality is, “I oppose therefore I am.” No wonder we often come away from conversations, even with friends, feeling slightly disappointed and dissatisfied. We delude ourselves if we think that we are communicating simply because we are literal. No two individuals’ emotions are identical. On that level there is no joining. Only degrees of separateness can be expressed. Something deeper than “honesty” broadcasting our superficial thoughts and feelings is needed if we are to achieve a real connection with another person.
And remember, as Henry David Thoreau said, “The only way to speak the truth is to speak lovingly.”
Adapted from Morning Notes, by Hugh Prather (Conari Press, 2005). Copyright (c) 2005 by Hugh Prather. Reprinted by permission of Conari Press.
Adapted from Morning Notes, by Hugh Prather (Conari Press, 2005).