Even though I spend my days writing and teaching about love and sex, I still find it challenging to delve into the topic of male sex toys. I am not alone in this, for many couples just introducing the idea of adding a vibrator into a relationship can sometimes be awkward and challenging. For a long time the only sex toys I sold on my good clean love site were for women. I was first introduced to male sex toys in the midst of adult entertainment trade shows where exhibitionism generally wins out over education; it didn’t really teach me much about the benefits and uses for the products.
Then one of my favorite toy companies, Lelo launched a men’s line. Trusting them as I do as a reliable source for sexual health products, I felt obliged to bring home some samples and test them out on my husband, who surprisingly didn’t take too much convincing. What we discovered in the test process and the research that I did following was that there is as much to learn about male pleasure and the tools to facilitate the job as for women. Many men are as unfamiliar with the extent and complexity of their pleasure anatomy as women are and because archaic associations between toys, anal stimulation and sexual identities still exist, many men still feel like they can’t ask. The idea that the penis shaft and head is the most or only erogenous zone for men is as outdated as the idea of the clitoris is a little button on top of the vagina.
Male sexual pleasure has many layers. The reason that anal stimulation is such a hot topic is that men have a g spot too, and the anus is the access point. Two very beautiful tools to explore this erogenous zone include Lelo’s new Bob as well as the beautiful stainless steel Njoy wands, both of which are designed for both external and internal use. Learning more about your man’s sexual anatomy and his wide range of pleasure zones will open your lovemaking to very different kinds of arousal and pleasurable sensations that may surprise both of you. Interestingly, the more that I have learned about the male pleasure anatomy, the more I am struck by the similarities between the genders. The same kinds of deep, intense internal orgasm that women find through locating their g-spots are readily available for men.