What is Your Belief System about Trauma?

If someone randomly commits violence against you, the facts seem to scream that life is unfair, you are innocent, random human cruelty took away your sense of self-control. But despite all that, whatís really happening is that you have shifted into relating to the world through a trauma.

It isnít the trauma itself that caused the shift. There had to be readiness inside. In truth life is neither fair nor unfair. The world is a reflection of who we are inside. If you can stop relating to the world through your trauma, there is hope that you can begin to relate through your soul. Here is how the process needs to go.

Victims hang on to their status because they feel innocent. The specific idea I am innocent is a blind, a mask. Yes, you are innocent. But only a stronger sense of self is going to rescue you. Your mind will never resolve why you, of all people, got hurt. Its struggles are futile from the outset.

Iíve met people who spend years in an attempt to figure out whether their misfortunes are due to bad karma. This becomes the magical word for a twisted logic that says, ďI didnít think I deserved to be hurt, but if you look at a deeper, more mystical layer, I did.Ē

This isnít really the answer. First of all, it doesnít heal the wound. Secondly, it exists as a mental construct and does little to salve the emotions, which are the chief fuel for ongoing victimization. You feel victimized, regardless of what your mind says.

The whole package–the event itself, the wound, the feelings that erupt, and the mindís scramble to find an explanation–is so interwoven that it cannot be untangled. If you can face this fact, you have come a long way to understanding how life works.

Adapted from: Peace Is the Way, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2005).

198 comments

Camilla Vaga
Camilla Vaga4 years ago

noted

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Miles Dugmore
Miles Dugmore5 years ago

and the rest...
The sort of anger you would open yourself up to should not be underestimated. Of course many people can display this sort of anger without ever really realising what the underlying cause is - to others they are just considered very dangerous angry people. The person who gets drunk and then becomes very violent. Their anger and violence is just misplaced anger, the anger that should really have been directed to the underlying cause and person so many years ago.

I am sorry if this has gone a bit off subject but I find articles such as the one above simplistic and for want of a better word "popularist" - but not to take away anything from the difficulties people who read such articles face in the hope of finding answers.

It is often possible to find "sticking plasters" to cover over some of the emotional pain, and a lot of these articles are no more than "sticking plasters" - hey some of them could stick for a very long time, and that would be fortunate. But often, when the "sticking plaster" comes under stress, it falls off.

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Miles Dugmore
Miles Dugmore5 years ago

The first thing you must note about this article is the footnote - how the doctor has used the term "doctor" and MD, and all the "accomplishments". It is an effort to lend credibility to what he says - but that can and often means nothing. People also write what people want to read, which is not necessarily a reflection of the way the world is, just the way people might like to think it is. Often such articles and books pray on peoples "wishes", just one step away from religion.

The writer of this articles ignore real structural changes that take place in our brains as a result of trauma. These are well known and documented, just that it's never really talked about because it does not fit well with the way most people want to think the way the world is.

Kathy P. I think I give you a little insight. You have, perhaps as a child, learned to dissociate from trauma. It was a leaned act of psychological survival that has followed you into adulthood. And it would have been a very effective coping mechanism as a younger person. But with dissociation comes numbing from positive emotions - sure you will have some, but they are likely to have been blunted severely. It would be possible over a period of time to resociate but the danger will be that this will bring about the huge amount of anger you would have repressed as a younger person when you learned to dissociate because of the trauma you were facing. The sort of anger you would open yourself up to should not be underestima

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Kathy Perez
Kathy Johnson5 years ago

My lack of understanding WHY really preoccupies me. 9 times out of 10 though, I am numb to trauma :/

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Dot A.
Dot A5 years ago

@ Ron F.
........,
I'm sure I was not his only victim.

I'm sure not, too, Ron* Perhaps another innocent victim may read this and find courage to recover. It's a lifelong process, so many expect to just have 'it all go away' one day. That never happens,... What can evolve is a greater sense of one's own self, the self that is made to reach out lovingly and keep that core of love even when others do not understand it, do not believe in it, do not accept it, and do not want it. This world has many victims, and the consequences are 'defensiveness' against any possible further harm. And the circle of woundedness continues, until the unselfish soul just wants to heal itself by loving others. Often this task is too great for one to accomplish in this lifetime. - eternity > now Now, and NOW gives second chances, but we don't have a clue exactly how long our chances keep returning until the open door finally falls behind us and - well, next step, not in my scope ,..... But, do keep your heart open to the goodness in others, and you will recognize the goodness in you!!! And in this way, you can begin your healing, and it goes on, and on, and on, throughout your life*

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Rob F.
B O5 years ago

Deepak Chopra says here how not to deal with it but does not clarify how to deal with trauma [except acknowledge it basically].
Some notes thoughts:
'THE GREATEST REVENGE IS TO LIVE WELL.' Instead of a mill stone round your neck it becomes a stepping stone. [I can expand! Imagine someone shafted you of money there was not a hope in hell of ever getting it back; if you resolved to become wealthy then it would be thanks to that situation that you transformed the situation. Mill stone/stepping stone!]
Discover your true self. [yes, words are easy!]
Karma means action. Cause effect; what goes 'round comes around; so create maximum value with your life. God is a concept: god is life so worship life!
EMDR if done correctly is a fascinating form of therapy. [it relates to, 'the body doesn't lie'.]
To Kathleen L (below) If there are any lessons from Vietnam, here's one, 'What is war good for? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!' Thanks to Billy Joel. Think of all the Vietnamese who were traumatized and anyone else who have been subjected to other peoples' inhumanity and treachery.
I was very violently raped 31 years ago. (Tomorrow is the anniversary.) The rapist (Irish) is a deejay in New Zealand; I'm sure I was not his only victim.

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Rob F.
B O5 years ago

He says here how not to deal with it but does not clarify how to deal with trauma [except acknowledge it basically].
Some notes thoughts:
'THE GREATEST REVENGE IS TO LIVE WELL.' Instead of a mill stone round your neck it becomes a stepping stone. [I can expand! Imagine someone shafted you of money there was not a hope in hell of ever getting it back; if you resolved to become wealthy then it would be thanks to that situation that you transformed the situation. Mill stone/stepping stone!]
Discover your true self. [yes, words are easy!]
Karma means action. Cause effect; what goes 'round comes around; so create maximum value with your life. God is a concept: god is life so worship life!
EMDR if done correctly is a fascinating form of therapy. [it relates to, 'the body doesn't lie'.]
To Kathleen L (above) If there are any lessons from Vietnam, here's one, 'What is war good for? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!' Thanks to Billy Joel. Think of all the Vietnamese who were traumatized and anyone else who have been subjected to other peoples' inhumanity and treachery.
I was very violently raped 31 years ago. (Tomorrow is the anniversary.) The rapist (Irish) is a deejay in New Zealand; I'm sure I was not his only victim.

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Dot A.
Dot A5 years ago

Compliments and Stars for all the honesty and true emotion shared. - for these expressions of hope and trust lead to a better life: the healing process, the restoration of whole self, the compassionate spirit united by the forces of love. Each one separate, personal, yet held in unity, such is the Vine of Life, continuing,.... Thank you All.

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Zee K.
Past Member 5 years ago

Jane, my heart goes out to you.

I know how it feels to be angry. It's horrible.
You want to strike out and you do but it
doesn't ease the horrible negativity
inside of us.

Oh, Jane, I wish I could reach out
and hold your hand and make all
the heartbreak go away.

I care.

LUV 2 U
and yours,
Zee

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Beverly G.
bev g5 years ago

i suffer with trauma after any sad events or something thats upset me badly. Im a very emotional caring person. it makes me ill for days. knocks my body out of sorts.

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