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Why I Talk About Vaginas

The gynechiatrist

My patient Hillary came to me because she had been trying to get pregnant for over four years. She took her temperature, peed on sticks, had sex at the right time, ate well, and prayed. And every month, when she began to bleed, she cried. She had done all the fertility tests, and everything came back normal. No one could explain why she wasnít conceiving, so she came to me — the gynechiatrist.

When I asked her to talk about her vagina, Hillary confessed that she had been molested by her uncle when she was a little girl. She had never told her mother or stood up to her uncle. Instead, she buried it deep within her pelvis and hoped it would go away. Then she found out he had molested three other girls in her family. And she feared for the safety of his own children, who were still young.

When I told her that we carry our traumas deep inside and they may manifest as gynecologic problems, she said, ďI need to tell everyone, donít I?Ē And I nodded.

Hillary did tell her family and started seeing a therapist, and two months later, she got pregnant. You might argue that this is just coincidence, but I donít think so. Iíve seen this happen in one way or another too many times in my career.

When I explained all of this to Stacey in an email, she wrote back with a passionate letter about how both she and her daughters had been sexually molested. She told me all the details in a long letter, about how they suffered at the hands of a man, how they have healed, and how they are trying to put the past behind them so they can move on. At the end of the letter, she said, ďThank you for letting me feel heard. That felt good.Ē

Why should we talk about vaginas?

For that very reason. Talking about vaginas opens women up to talk about so much more; giving your vagina a voice can set you free. Itís all part of embracing your power and accepting and loving the whole you. So letís liberate ourselves and OWN this part of our bodies. Say it with me. VAGINA.

What do you think? Have you ever talked to your vagina or listened to what she has to say? Does vagina talk weird you out? Does it feel silly or trivial? Does it feel empowering or celebratory? Do you love it, hate it, feel indifferent to it? Do you carry any traumas in your vagina? If you gave your vagina a voice, what would it say?

Read more: Body Image, Gynecology, Health, Love, Mental Wellness, Pregnancy, Self-Help, Sex, Women's Health, , , , , , ,

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Lissa Rankin

Lissa Rankin, MD is a mind-body medicine physician, founder of the†Whole Health Medicine Institute training program for physicians and other health care providers, and the New York Times bestselling author of†Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself.† She is on a grassroots mission to heal health care, while empowering you to heal yourself.† Lissa blogs at† and also created two online communities -† and† She is also the author of two other books, a professional artist, an amateur ski bum, and an avid hiker. Lissa lives in the San Francisco Bay area with her husband and daughter.


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12:45AM PDT on May 11, 2013

Goodness me what next

1:41PM PDT on May 5, 2013

Because Lissa, you do it so well!!!

12:31AM PDT on Apr 28, 2013

Thank you :)

4:22PM PDT on Apr 9, 2013

I seriously have issues with the way this woman tries to validate other females for using the word vagina, and does it in such a patronising way. I hop she doesn't talk to the victims of abuse like that, I really do.

12:36AM PDT on Mar 28, 2013


8:06PM PDT on Mar 25, 2013

Thank you for article.

8:05PM PDT on Mar 25, 2013

Thank you for article.

8:04PM PDT on Mar 25, 2013

Thank you for article.

12:19AM PDT on Mar 23, 2013

Since when is the vagina a "sensational topic" Teresa W? It is simply another topic concerning women like a myriad of other subjects. Interesting article.

12:01AM PDT on Mar 23, 2013

Miacid T, many women still feel sorrow over it. It doesn't matter if something is legal. There can still be emotional reprecussions. People may still feel conflicted or have guilt.

And it does have an effect on the body. It still IS a medical procedure. There may be a lot of abortions each year, but there are a lot of everything each year and it doesn't mean that for the peopel going through it, it won't be major for them.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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