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Why You Need To Take Time For You

Why You Need To Take Time For You

Everybody needs some time to shine, time to be recognized, special, admired. It’s not selfish: it’s human.

Early one Saturday I saw in the local paper that a workshop for blues musicians was scheduled for that very morning. I showed the notice to my husband, who intends to be the world’s next great blues harmonica player. “I’d like to go, “he said, “but I promised I would paint your office.” I assured him that the office could wait and sent him off with my blessing.

He thought I was being selfless and wonderful, but I really wasn’t. You see, I’d had a lot of shine time that week—a couple of career successes, lunch out with five favorite friends, and a massage that had accounted for one, entire, luxurious hour. I was full. When you’re basking in the sun, it’s natural to want those you love to join you there. But if you’re not getting enough of your own shine time, it’s easy to be needy, whiny, and pitiful.

It can get worse than that: the shine-deficient tend to resent other people’s accomplishments and dampen their dreams. Sometimes, they sabotage the potential of even their own children because their need for personal recognition is so seldom met. Parents who want to keep their children from pursuing an art or a sport “because it’s not practical” are in this category. So are those who push their kids toward unrealistic academic or athletic achievements. They’re trying to get some shine secondhand.

For your own benefit as well as for the benefit of those around you, shining regularly is as crucial as bathing regularly. You can get the shine time that’s essential to creating a charmed life in myriad ways. Among them:

  • Indulge yourself often in what you do well. If you’re a good swimmer, swim. If you’re a good seamstress, sew.
  • Spend time with people who think you’re splendid – and who’ll tell you so.
  • Celebrate yourself. Mark the occasions of your life with friends and festivity. Never get too old to have birthday parties.

Get more suggestions from Victoria on!

Victoria Moran is an inspirational and comedic speaker, a spiritual-life coach and the author of the international bestseller Creating a Charmed Life.

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11:20AM PDT on Oct 19, 2013

Really good essay. I especially like the warning that if you don't take time for yourself, you'll get peevish at others' accomplishments, and also the suggestion to hang with people who are in your cheering corner. Thanks.

12:40PM PDT on Oct 18, 2013

Me time is important...especially,if you're always being pulled in all different directions
Get off the merry go round and just be

7:59AM PDT on Oct 17, 2013


4:28PM PDT on Oct 16, 2013

I love my "me" time so much! Oh how I need and enjoy it..

5:50AM PDT on Oct 15, 2013

Thank you very much.

7:08AM PDT on Oct 14, 2013

Every day i save an hour 4 myself but away from home. It's nearly impossible to have alone time at home with my 4 legged kids. Thanks

7:08AM PDT on Oct 14, 2013

Indeed, we all need to give ourselves time alone. I call it needing my space. Some don't recognize that their spirit/ soul longs for time alone- time for some peace and quiet and soak up the blessings of the day. A quiet time alone also enhances one's inner peace. It is as simple as taking a short walk, sit outside and enjoy the fresh air, or sip your beverage quietly
and count your blessings. Or, before going to sleep, take a moment to pray or meditate- all it takes is a few minutes. Start your day with a brief prayer for the blessing of another day.

3:29AM PDT on Oct 14, 2013

For rest and self reflection

2:33AM PDT on Oct 14, 2013


5:09PM PDT on Oct 13, 2013

Thank you for sharing. Shine time.. I like that phrase :)

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
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