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New Study Finds 85% Of Americans Don't Know All The Dance Moves To National Anthem-- ONION NEWS***


Offbeat  (tags: americans, culture, funny, humor, off-beat, society )

Kit
- 898 days ago - theonion.com
According to a survey published Wednesday by historians at Boston University, more than 85 percent of Americans are unfamiliar with the upbeat, traditional dance routine intended to accompany the singing of the national anthem. ***ONION NEWS*** HUMOR*



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Comments

Kit B. (276)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 9:35 am

ONION NEWS*** This is humor, satire, a joke!


According to a survey published Wednesday by historians at Boston University, more than 85 percent of Americans are unfamiliar with the upbeat, traditional dance routine intended to accompany the singing of the national anthem.

Once taught in the nation's elementary schools, showcased at the start of all sporting events, and included as part of the exam for new U.S. citizens, the patriotic kicks, dips, waves, and twirls from "The Star-Spangled Banner" have nearly vanished from the public consciousness over the past century, the study found.

"From a historical perspective, it came as quite a shock that nearly nine out of 10 Americans could not recall more than a single step of what was, for many years, an essential part of civic life," said Kenneth P. O'Neill, who co-authored the report. "Most people are familiar with the dance's iconic first move, placing one's right hand over one's heart. But when we asked them what comes next—placing the left hand over the right and pumping back and forth—people had no idea what we were talking about."

Please read on at Visit Site to read full story and dance moves, you must learn the correct dance moves.
 

John Doe (22)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 10:00 am
Thanks Kit - It's easy - Hand on heart, bow your head, say a prayer (God bless America, in God we trust, land of the free, land of the brave, land of brainwashed 'patriots' etc), star spangled banner in one hand, gun in the other, skip off to war in a country far away. -Correct? - This is also attempted 'humour' but it ain't necessarily so?
 

Elle B. (82)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 10:47 am
Thank-you Kit. I do remember seeing remnants of these moves in the 1950's. Never saw any jumps, fists, splits or the shimmies and shuffles. But did see the cross over chest, foot plant turns and salutes. When i was in grade school there was an older woman that would lead us through some moves at the local roller rink on girls only day. Opening number was always the Star Spangled Banner. After intermission was the Hokey Pokey. She was a hoot! I have not thought about that since until reading this article...lol. Note: Think i'll work on the routine...the splits are a bit doubtful though. My daughter is a youth group director and teaches a dance class for toddlers-K once a week as well...i'm going to share this with her! I think kids of all ages will like it...'i'm wondering what those pre-schoolers will do with it...they are something else! Good Stuff! :) [Flashback: skating rinks and school on snow days--were the few times we girls got to wear pants "under" our skirts/dresses in social settings.]
 

Past Member (0)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 10:57 am
Silly me, I thought it was the Hokey Pokey that it's all about. ;)
 

Terry King (109)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 11:38 am
I blame Obama!
 

Alice C. (1797)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 11:39 am
I thought is was the tango !
 

Phil R. (29)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 12:26 pm
I'm not doin' #4! I don't care what! Call me unpatriotic, but when landing on my onions becomes a possibility, i have to draw the line there!
 

wendy webber (28)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 12:30 pm
Yeah, I thought it was the Hokey-Pokey too!
 

Kit B. (276)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 12:45 pm

Oh sure, Terry blame the Cool guy. Phil, that's just not very patriotic of you.

I would love to see a stadium full of people trying to do this dance. That would be a Laugh Out Loud. Meanwhile, in the background some professional singer is trying to remember the words and keep that melody.
 

Yvonne White (233)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 1:24 pm
As long as it's not the Macarena! Kinda miss those cloggers on Grand Ol' Opery back in the day..;)
 

Allan Yorkowitz (448)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 2:07 pm
I'm very happy with the right hand over the heart dance routine...
 

Antonia Windham (6)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 2:43 pm
Terpsichorean illiterates. And the article's nothing but a mass of disinformation.

The National Anthem's requiring the traditional pavane, choreographed in a stately and dignified fashion. The choreography's as follows:

Starting in fifth position, tendu to fourth position, demi-plié, rise (keep those shoulders down and buttocks tucked well in), tendu back to fifth position, entrechat, chasse, back to fifth position, pirouette (with three revolutions minimum), échappé, changement, changement, changement, then a series of chaînés leading up to a perfect arabesque (point those toes!), before ending up back in fifth position.
 

Past Member (0)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 3:04 pm
End up in traction, maybe! There goes my back!
 

Pat B. (354)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 3:36 pm
See...I had it all wrong. According to the article, "'O'er the ramparts we watched,' you're supposed to face the person on your right, fold your arms, plant your right foot, and kick around in a clockwise three-quarter circle," and I have had a hard time with that...as I always seem to kick the person next to me, or get it backwards! Shame on me...I guess I'm still part of the 85% who can't seem to get it right. Thanks Kit for this tongue in cheek post. (I LOVE Onion!!!)
 

Kit B. (276)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 3:44 pm

Oooh, the Black Swan cometh! Give me a little bit of Bob Fosse for choreography.
 

Antonia Windham (6)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 4:45 pm
The Black Swan doesn't do the work of the plebian Fosse, Kit B (uttered as the Swan looks disdainfully down its aristocratic beak at you.) Perhaps a touch of Balanchine or Petipa?
 

Kit B. (276)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 4:51 pm

When your right, Antonia you're right. Fosse always was my kind of guy, truly a man of the people, whereas Balanchine was writing for the high brows...only!
 

Past Member (0)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 5:09 pm
I kinda like this guy.
 

Kit B. (276)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 5:43 pm

Me too, MJM! I like thay guy!
 

Brad Miller (120)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 5:47 pm
Thanks for the good cheer Kit. It's showtime!
 

Sue Matheson (76)
Thursday July 5, 2012, 6:56 pm
thanks
 

Robert B. (58)
Friday July 6, 2012, 8:36 am
Without Universal Health Care we can't afford to do those risky Patriotic moves.:)
 

cynthia B. (267)
Friday July 6, 2012, 8:57 am
rather risky I didn't ever see this dance
 

John B. (122)
Friday July 6, 2012, 12:14 pm
Thanks Kit you really have made my day and all the comments are a hoot too. Read and laughingly noted.
 

Donna B. (36)
Friday July 6, 2012, 12:49 pm
Thx Kit. Even though this is such sad news that you brought to us. I am still trying ti deal with it. I think I will be ok. Just gonna take some time. I myself don't even know the moves!! Wah! Wah! Wah! {not serious, of course, ok?}
 

marie c. (168)
Friday July 6, 2012, 5:09 pm
So good to laugh on a thread sometime
Thanks Kit
 

Pepe Pops (7)
Friday July 6, 2012, 6:40 pm
Pogo,works for every country anthems included..
 

Fred Krohn (34)
Friday July 6, 2012, 6:52 pm
Is the 502 error part of the joke? Yes, I know The Onion is a satire publication, and I frankly couldn't care less about whether there are 'dance steps' to Francis Scott key music or not, but I do respect the song itself and the nation we had when we put Armstrong and Aldrin on the moon. We need that back and to toss the last two decades of defective lawmaking.
 

Past Member (0)
Friday July 6, 2012, 7:27 pm
Oh say Fred, can you see, by that early dawn light, what you so proudly hail, is your lack of a sense of humor?

 

Dee C. (210)
Friday July 6, 2012, 7:40 pm
Thanks Kit..

Pretty funny..
 

Isabelle J. (87)
Sunday July 8, 2012, 8:02 am
Funny!
 
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