#Lookadouche: Texas Teens Fight Back Against Sexist ‘Dateability’ Expert

School assemblies are the worst. I had to sit packed into the school gymnasium just to be lectured on drugs or forced to participate in organized school spirit. Like I said, the worst. And my school assemblies weren’t even as bad as this one.

Justin Lookadoo is apparently some kind of faith-based motivational speaker and expert in the made-up word “dateability.” He did, after all, co-author two books on the subject: Dateable: are you? are they? and The Dateable Rules. Definitely sounds like someone who should be talking to impressionable young minds.

I was being sarcastic in that last sentence, but the parents of the Richardson High School PTA actually thought this sounded like a good idea. That’s what I presume, anyway, since this Lookadoo was brought in to speak at a PTA-sponsored event.

Lookadoo doesn’t just have two books devoted to “dateability.” He has a website, too. The URL – and I’m not making this up – is rudateable.com. Get it? R U dateable! So hip! His website, which was made available to students, provides helpful rules for boy and girls. Here’s a sample, but I suggest you read them for yourself:

For girls:

Accept your girly-ness. You’re a girl. Be proud of all that means. You are soft, you are gentle, you are a woman. Don’t try to be a guy. Guys like you because you are different from them. So let your girly-ness soar.

Be mysterious. Dateable girls know how to shut up. They don’t monopolize the conversation. They don’t tell everyone everything about themselves. They save some for later. They listen more than they gab.

Need him. Dateable girls know that guys need to be needed. A Dateable girl isn’t Miss Independent. She knows we are made for community. Needing each other is part of faith. She allows him to be needed at times, knowing he was called to serve just as much as she was.

For boys:

Being a guy is good. Dateable guys know they aren’t as sensitive as girls and that’s okay. They know they are stronger, more dangerous, and more adventurous and that’s okay. Dateable guys are real men who aren’t afraid to be guys.

Men of God are wild, not domesticated. Dateable guys aren’t tamed. They don’t live by the rules of the opposite sex. They fight battles, conquer lands, and stand up for the oppressed.

Keep it covered up. Dateable guys know that porn is bad for the spirit and the mind. They keep women covered up.

Ugh. I threw up in my mouth a little. Ladies, don’t talk! Boys, you are untamed animals! It’s every gender stereotype in two handy lists.

In addition to these “cool rules,” there is a short, nonsensical quiz to find out if you are “dateable” or not. Separate quizzes for boys and girls, of course. (Full disclosure: I took this quiz. I’m evidently a “wanted woman.” If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be on the lamb.)

When students were informed of the assembly on Tuesday, some parents went on Lookadoo’s website and voiced concerned about the obviously sexist content to the principle. At first the assembly was postponed, then it was supposed to be optional. However, the assembly ultimately went on as scheduled.

It wasn’t just parents who were upset. It was reported that many students walked out on what was called on Twitter a “rant against women.” Some students took to Twitter under the hashtag #lookadouche (burn!) to stand up to such blatant misogyny.

Lookadoo has speaking engagements throughout the country in the next eight months, including several schools. If your school is bringing in some dude to enforce gender stereotypes to your school, at the very least you should know about it.

Photo Credit: Jason Smith/YouTube


Jerome S
Jerome S7 months ago


Jim Ven
Jim Ven7 months ago

thanks for sharing.

Donna Ferguson
Donna F4 years ago

yeah, the guy's a dirtbag. but the words "douche" or "douchebag" are INCREDIBLY offensive to me, as a woman. these words are in common usage, and all over the tv. disgusting!

Lorna Wood
Lorna Wood4 years ago

Our school sells class rings with different mottos for girls and guys. Girls can have words like "loyalty" and "virtue" engraved on their rings. Guys get "strength" and "determination." So far, no one has complained. We plan to ask to purchase our cap and gown, sold by the same company, elsewhere. Of course we will not buy a ring.

Jennifer Whildin
Jennifer Whildin4 years ago

Love the "#Lookadouche" tag. Perfect! So sexist, so stupid, so dangerous. He probably blames girls who get raped and thinks the rapist was just "being a man." If this guy is being allowed to spread this crap in public schools, I think we need to also get a "separation of church and state" case going, because he's pushing a type of religious thinking.

Amanda M.
Amanda M4 years ago

Glad to see that the students were knowledgeable enough to see right through this douchebag's bullshit and actually WALKED OUT on his spiel!

There's hope for the youth of Texas yet!

Joan E.
Joan E4 years ago

I'm glad the teens can smell what he's selling. I hope the school districts stop wasting taxpayer money on it.

Glenda L.
Glenda L4 years ago

Really, they're wasting their time in school listening to that kind of douche?

Cassie Marcks
Cassie Marcks4 years ago

uh, isnt that just wonderful....douche

JACarlton Author
jill c4 years ago

he looks like a partially shaved hedgehog. (sorry hedgehogs dn't mean to insult y'all). But seriously, I bet his last date was with mr. lefty or mr. righty... or maybe it was in the closet at the pray away the gay camp? Either way... he really needs to move out of 1995 and into 2013.

as for his philosophies... me thinks he's the one who'd best just shut up, or maybe someone will use the 'lookadouche' defense next time a group of football players gang rape a girl at a party and put it up on the internet...
I can hear it now:

"Yeah I conquered HER alright! She was passed out cold and I stuck it to her so hard she'll feel it till next week!... and I got 1,000 likes for the vid in the first hour... it's going viral man... I called it slut-f##k... you can look it up, facebook isn't gonna take it down..."

yeah... great message you fascist p.o.s.