4 Sexy Qualities Both Men & Women Love

By Janet Ong Zimmerman for YourTango.com.

We asked YourTango readers to tell us which of their body parts they like the best. Resoundingly, the answer we saw most was “eyes.” Of course, while physical attraction is important, overall attraction isn’t just about body parts. It’s also about those inexplicable qualities that create chemistry. So, we asked dating coach and YourTango Expert Janet Ong Zimmerman to weigh in on how any person can become more attractive ó regardless of physical attributes ó and here’s what she had to say:

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1. Be real. Ever notice how you tend to gravitate towards a person who is comfortable in their own skin, who accepts and embraces their quirkiness, stands for what’s important to them and has their own opinions? A real person shows all of who they are and doesn’t try to hide their self-perceived bad sides. They’re authentic and express themselves openly with what they’re thinking and how they’re feeling without being overly concerned about how others view them.

2. Be vulnerable. Isn’t romantic love about having a meaningful connection with that special person? The more you can let someone in, the more they can get to know the real you. Vulnerability is the place where connection and true intimacy reside. When you’re vulnerable, you provide a safe space for your partner to be who they are and to express themselves openly.

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3. Live passionately. Instead of putting your life on hold and waiting for someone else to add excitement to your life, find and live your own passions. This zest for life that radiates outward from doing what you love is extremely attractive to others. They will find it inspiring and uplifting to be around you because you’re engaged with and loving life.

4. See your partner through fresh eyes. No one likes to be taken for granted, but we all tend to do it, especially in long-term relationships. Appreciate and enjoy your partner for who they are and what they do. How? Be present with your partner instead of focusing on what they did wrong in the past or what might happen in the future.

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Get even more insights and expert advice about how to feel irresistible at any love stage!

This article originally appeared on YourTango.com:†4 Irresistible Qualities Men & Women Love.


Kathy Perez
Kathy Johnson4 years ago

I really enjoyed this :)

Alena Carter
Alena Carter4 years ago

I would think most of all confidence and a great personality.

Ernie Miller
william M4 years ago


Fi T.
Past Member 4 years ago

Appreciate what we have

John Wedderburn
.4 years ago

A somewhat oversimplified article, but slightly amusing.

heather g.
heather g4 years ago

I agree with others - more than four necessary. Integrity, intelligence, kindness, caring, etc

Both partners also need a sense of humour ..... especially when you need to 'look at your partner with new eyes' - after years and years of marriage.

May Welford
May W4 years ago

Seriously, JUST four...?, thanks for these four but I'm pretty sure you are leaving some behind...!

Debbie Williamson
Solitary E4 years ago

Thank you.

Danial W.
Past Member 4 years ago


Patricia H.
Patricia H4 years ago

Have strong morals & values. Someone that is strong enough to take the road less traveled to have integrity. That is sexy!