Finding the Real You

Weíre all clinging to images of ourselves that pile up year after year. Some images make us look good, some make us look bad. But images canít substitute for the real things. The real you is vital and alive, shifting and changing at every moment.

In everyoneís life, the ego extends its lease by saying, ďHold on. Keep trying. I know what to do.Ē But stand back and consider what this strategy comes down to: If all your hard work hasnít brought you what you want, work harder. If you donít have enough, get more. If your dream fails, keep following it. If you grow insecure, believe in yourself more. Never acknowledge failure; success is the only option.

This kind of ego motivation, turned into slogans, is deeply ingrained in popular culture. Following your dream and never giving up has become a credo repeated by the rich, famous, and successful. Yet for every winner of a beauty pageant, stock-car race, World Series, or Hollywood audition, there are an untold number whose dream didnít come true. They followed their dream just as hard and believed in it just as much. By no means did the egoís strategy work for them.

Fortunately, thereís another way; itís the exact opposite of the egoís strategy: If all your hard work hasnít brought you what you want, look for new inspiration. If you donít have enough, find it in yourself. If your dream fails, and you see that it was a fantasy, find a dream that matches your reality. If you grow insecure, detach yourself from the situation until you find your center again. You are not shaken by either success of failure; the flow of life brings both, as temporary states.

The real self is a shifting, elusive phantom thatís always one step ahead of us. It dissolves the instant you think youíre about to grab it. You canít ever nail down who you really are. To understand your real self, you have to keep up as it moves. Finding the real you happens on the run. The same holds true for grace, since it is part of the real you.

Adapted from Reinventing The Body, Resurrecting The Soul, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2009).


Elisa Faulkner- Uriarte
Elisa F5 years ago

Great advice. Thank you Deepak!

Eli Is Here
.7 years ago

Great article! Thank you Deepak!!

Kenneth L.
Kenneth L7 years ago

"The real self is a shifting, elusive phantom that’s always one step ahead of us. It dissolves the instant you think you’re about to grab it. You can’t ever nail down who you really are"

Oh, really? Now how do you KNOW this? (As opposed to just having the idea of it.)

No one has ever 'nailed down who they really are'? lol! Again, how would you know this?

Jennifer V.
Past Member 7 years ago

What a wonderful article.

Lynn C.
Lynn C7 years ago

As always Deepak, you give beautiful words to catch the soul's attention. Thank you.

Jewels S.
Jewels S8 years ago

I have definitely learned that the journey does not always look like what your original goal is. Sometimes the new path is even better. Destiny isn't the choices we make but the chances we take.

charmaine c.
Charmaine C8 years ago

Thanks for a lovely article.

Jen H.
Jen H8 years ago

Another great article!

Ann W.
Ann W8 years ago

Very true. Beware of letting other peole shape your dreams. Or ridicule them.

Janine F.
Janine F8 years ago

thankyou for a lovely post. It is great when you find what you needto hear when you need to hear it.