How to Actually Stick with Your Goals

Since most of us have probably failed our resolutions already, this seems like a good opportunity to chat about sticking to the things you finally want to achieve. Nodding in agreement? Well let’s get to it…

Ask yourself: Do I really want this?

Why do so many of us fail at achieving our goals? Well, it partly has to do with the fact that many of us don’t understand what goal-setting is to begin with. It’s not something you make on a whim. A true goal must be something you are fully committed to, regardless of hardships or challenges. If you consider something a goal, it has to be something you desire to fully embody, not just a passing fancy.

Take learning a new language, for example. In the most egocentric way, I think it would be cool to learn another language. I would love the ego trip of other people knowing that I could communicate in an entirely different language. Hey, I’m human.

But, I have never successfully made it much past French, Spanish or German 101. Why? Because it is a lot of work and I don’t truly want it.

If my intentions for learning a second language were more pure and less egocentric—say I were moving to Munich or Montreal and wanted to be able to communicate fully—I might be blogging in German by now. But I am not simply because I haven’t set a powerful enough intention.

Those who are regularly successful at achieving their goals tend to start from a base of pure, genuine desire. In this age where our social media image can seem to reign supreme, this can be a real challenge. Thoroughly vet your goals. Are you trying to improve yourself? Or are you consciously or subconsciously trying to impress others. Be honest with yourself. If you are just in it for the Insta-image, the ego-stroke of a smaller pant size, or to appear more accomplished to friends, your efforts for success may be better directed elsewhere.

Woman standing in field barefoot

Set realistic expectations.

Okay, so you’ve set your intention. You are 100 percent committed to your goal. Good for you, that’s half the battle! But let’s get real; you’re not going to experience dramatic results overnight. True success takes consistent, long term effort. That why your intentions need to be pure. Anything less, and you’ll find your so-called “goals” and “resolutions” shriveled and dried up merely a month after you embraked on them. Sound familiar?

Set a schedule for yourself, but not one that involves you waking up at 4am every morning, eating 4 raw eggs and training until noon. Be realistic. Set up a flexible, low pressure situation in which you can thrive, but keep to a regular schedule. If you want to start a side hustle, dedicate a specified amount of time to that work each day/week, no excuses. If you want to feel healthier, go for a walk around the block at 3pm every day, rain or shine. Practice diligence and patience by focusing on the small, incremental successes in your journey. Over time, those small successes will add up into real accomplishment!

Get support where you need it.

When setting out to accomplish a goal, you want a good friend to be like a good bra—supportive, but not overly so. Find a trusted friend or colleague to support you from the sidelines on your newest venture. We all experience moments of weakness. It’s part of the process. Find a person you can count on to get you out of the mind swamp and back on track. Many people also find life coaches to be great for this. You just need someone outside yourself who will give you the space to do your thing and forge your own path, but is willing to hold you accountable for those moments when desire and willpower simply aren’t enough.

Listen, we all have goals. We’ve all struggled with our goals. We’ve all failed. Don’t try the same thing over and over again. Make a change in the pattern. Come at your goals from a place of realistic intention and you’ll be set up for success at long last!

What are some of your goals that have gone unrequited year after year? What can you do to ensure success this time around?     

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53 comments

Fiona O
Fiona O5 hours ago

Develope your own rituals, record for yourself you own guided meditations.....you best support....from from your inner voice and your own being and actions.

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Deborah W
Deborah Wyesterday

DON'T LET YOUR WORRIES GET THE BEST OF YOU .... remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

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Veronica D
Veronica D2 days ago

Thank you so very much.

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Veronica D
Veronica D2 days ago

Thank you so very much.

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Veronica D
Veronica D2 days ago

Thank you so very much.

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Deborah W
Deborah W5 days ago

TODAY IS VALENTINE'S DAY ... also ASH WEDNESDAY for those who try to practice their faith. Have you seen or heard of the "ASHES TO GO" initiative? Many who have the privilege of dispensing the symbolistic ritual have taken to high-traffic areas, to keep the tradition available to those who so wish but feel they currently don't have enough time in the day for all their other demands, by appearing at places previously mentioned, as well as others (intersections and street corners for example).

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Maureen G
Maureen G9 days ago

Being realistic, I feel, is so important and then finding the self discipline to carry through.....rarely easy..

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Jan S
Jan S9 days ago

tyfs

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Ramesh B
Ramesh B9 days ago

Thank you

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Danii P
Danii P9 days ago

Thank you.

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