My “Perfect Guy” List (When I Was 14!)

Are you with the kind of person you always thought you would end up with? Or has the rose-tinted picture of your future Mr. Perfect-For-Me changed throughout the years?

The other day, I found an old diary I kept when I was 14. Most of it was of course cringe-worthy—lots of teenage angst and whining and plenty about my crush(es) and how we were obviously meant to be, if only I could muster up the courage to talk to them or even talk somewhere in their general vicinity.

But the most fascinating page in the whole diary? A list of 21 qualities my “perfect guy” would possess. I wanted to simultaneously hug and high-five my 14-year-old self as I read through each quality—I remember how much time I spent crafting the list, and how seriously I took it.

Cringe along with me…and please share your perfect guy (or girl) list, past or present, in the comments. Do your current wants match up with what you wanted when you were 14? 24? 34?

Here it is, exactly as it appeared in my diary:

Diana’s Perfect Guy
1. likes to cuddle
2. is relaxed
3. gets “it”
4. understands that when I say I don’t want to talk, he needs to pry
5. is completely in love with me
6. scratches my back
7. likes reminding me with small cute things that he likes me
8. is willing to be totally open
9. communicates
10. kisses me in the rain
11. is a little tough
12. can hold a conversation
13. will write me love letters
14. will be there for me
15. will be a friend
16. will care because he does, not because he has to
17. dances
18. thinks I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever known
19. cares about me on a deep level
20. is really funny
21. is not completely mentally f***ed up [Not sure where this one came from. I think I was having a dark teenage moment.]

Save for “kisses me in the rain,” an arbitrary desire that I choose to blame on romantic comedies, many of these are still on my “perfect guy” list—and lucky me, my boyfriend happens to possess the most important ones. Whether that means that I was a particularly wise 14-year-old or that I just haven’t matured much since my early teen years…well, that’s still up for debate.

Image Credit: photostock /


Fi T.
Past Member 4 years ago

Simple is the best

Sarah Helper
Sarah Mussa5 years ago

This made me laugh. I actually wrote a list when I was 14 too ( Im 22 now). I found it last year - too bad I threw it away. I do remember it was way too detailed (cringe) and included things I couldn't care less about today ex: he has to ride horses (rly? wtf)..

Hanna Barney
Hanna Barney5 years ago

lol. i agree with Nicole S. i

Marie W.
Marie W5 years ago

Times change.

Samantha S.
Samantha Shira5 years ago

how times have changed, haha.

Masha Samoilova
Past Member 5 years ago


Teresa Wlosowicz
Teresa W5 years ago

Grow up! Love doesn't exist!

Teresa Wlosowicz
Teresa W5 years ago

I didn't make a perfect-guy list at 14, but, under the influence of silly love stories, I also temporarily believed in love at that time. Soon afterwards, I grew out of it completely.

Teresa Wlosowicz
Teresa W5 years ago

When I was 14, I was silly and naive. Then I grew up.

Ra Sc
Ra Sc5 years ago

Not a bad list. I'm not sure what I would have listed when I was a teen. But I know that I no longer value lists, because I now realize I fall in love with people, not lists of attributes. And if I've fallen in love with someone, it's not really a choice anyhow, so it doesn't really matter if they fit some list I made before I met them.